Verbal affirmations are incredibly important to me. I once told this to a (now ex) partner over eggs at an old-people diner, and I was told in return that I was "regressive" for wanting to be complimented (puke). It's not always easy to express your needs: emotional, physical, and especially sexual. If your partner doesn’t like cuddling after sex and non-sexual physical touch after sex is important to you, it can feel impossible to talk about it. Like asking for more verbal affirmations, asking your partner to engage in more non-sexual physical touch can be a process. Yet you never need to feel bad for advocating for yourself within your relationship.
"We are always allowed to ask for what we need and discuss needs with our partners — ours and theirs. What we are not allowed to do is force, coerce, or demand," Relationship and Wellbeing Coach Shula Melamed MA, MPH says. "We need to start evaluating when our needs are not being considered or there isn't even a space for conversation about them. All parties should feel safe, comfortable, acknowledged and stimulated."