While they're not quite as effective as, say, talking to a professional or having a good cry on a friend's shoulder, there are some mantras to use after you've been cheated on that can help you begin to move on. When you feel lost in the aftermath of a terrible breakup, clinging to helpful phrase like a life raft might make you feel calmer, more centered, and even more confident. These aren't exactly magic spells — you can't utter a few words and instantly fix a broken heart. But if you find a mantra that resonates with you, you might be able to find temporarily relief and briefly boost your spirits.
As several relationship experts point out below, if you've been cheated on, it's important to remember that this incident was not your fault. Your ex's actions rest on their shoulders — not yours. And even if this experience is incredibly painful right now, trust that you won't always feel this way. With time, you'll be able to gain perspective, move on, and be able to trust others again.
Read the mantras below and feel free to use whichever one is calling to you in the moment.
While it can be tempting to look inward and try to find things you might have done to cause this betrayal, the fact of the matter is that what happened was their fault and their fault only.
According to marriage and family therapist Nicole Richardson, cheating often happens because of the cheater's poor communication skills. "They may not [have known] how to tell [you] that they [didn’t] feel valued, needed, or seen," Richardson previously told Elite Daily.
As much as you may want to get this grieving process over with as soon as possible, it's important to let yourself take all of the time that it needs to cope with all of your complicated feelings.
“Forgiveness and grief are similar as there are stages, and you may move from denial to depression as new information or hurts arise,” warned Richardson. Go with the flow and give yourself permission to feel whatever comes up for you as new interactions and information arise.
Deciding where you want to go from here in terms of your relationship can be stressful, but the key is to just listen to your gut.
“Forgiveness does not necessarily mean staying together,” Richardson said. “If you are [still] wondering if you should stay with a partner who has cheated, your gut is telling you what to do.”
It may feel absurd to miss someone who hurt you so deeply, but the fact of the matter is that the person played an important role in your life. It's only normal to miss them. Even once months have gone by and you're starting to feel like you're really finally over it, you may still have fleeting moments of missing them.
"After a breakup, people should expect withdrawal symptoms for roughly six months and increase their self-care and social support during this season," licensed psychologist Dr. Wyatt Fisher told Elite Daily.
Hopefully one of these mantras helps get you through this difficult time.