If you've found yourself wanting to have sex less often lately, don't sound the alarm just yet. There are numerous explanations as to why your libido might change, according to Dr. Jessica O'Reilly, sexologist and relationship expert. Rather than ignoring the shift in your sex drive, Dr. Jess suggests understanding why your feelings might be changing and speaking openly with your partner about how often you'd like to do the deed.
There are plenty of factors that play into a person's sex drive, Dr. Jess explains in an interview with Elite Daily, including, "stress levels, medications, menstrual cycles, relationship duration, relationship satisfaction, communication, sleep habits, exercise, fitness, mood, and hormone levels."
In other words, even if you're typically very satisfied with the frequency of your sex life, it's normal to go through phases in which physical intimacy dips down on your list of priorities.
According to Dr. Jess, sex drives and the frequency at which partners have sex are a balancing act; it's normal if it takes awhile for you and your partner to figure out this dynamic, or for it to change over time.
"If you want a mutually validating, trustful, lasting, and compatible relationship — you and your partner should talk about sex," says Dr. Jess. She also stresses that cultivating compatibility is a team effort and a conversation about what you both enjoy is a great place to start. So how can you talk this out? Dr. Jess breaks it down into three simple steps.