Here's What To Do If You & Your SO Have Different Dream Wedding Ideas

by Korey Lane
Originally Published: 

Some people dream about their weddings for years. So, when they get finally engaged, they imagine their dream wedding springing to life. But it doesn't always work out that way, because real life is not a Pinterest board. If you have different dream wedding ideas than your partner, how can you find a compromise? It's a big day for both of you, and you both deserve to be happy.

First of all, if you and your partner are struggling with how to compromise on what you want for your wedding, know that you are not alone. In fact, it happens a lot! It's likely that this is the first time you and your significant other have organized such a meaningful event together, and so it's pretty typical if the process of planning a wedding feels like a major new challenge. "This is [probably] the first time [a couple has] planned something to reflect both personalities, so often times it's a bit of a learning curve and exploratory stage to learn a bit more about each other and their priorities for the big day!" wedding planner Jacin Fitzgerald, founder of Jacin Fitzgerald Events, tells Elite Daily.

So, don't forget that it might take some time to come to an agreement with your partner, but try not to put too much pressure on your partner or the relationship. After all, a wedding is a happy occasion for everyone involved, so compromise is important.

Cameron Whitman/ Stocksy

But how can you begin to compromise on one of the most special days of your life? Well, it should start with clear communication. "One of the best things to do is sit down and talk it out," wedding planner Kia Martinson, owner of ESTOccasions, tells Elite Daily. "Have an honest conversation about what you both want and understand there may be a point where some of those things don't work for wedding day. See if there are ways to add in those wants into bachelor or bachelorette parties." For example, if you love the idea of incorporating rose gold into your wedding, but your partner isn't into it, have rose gold décor at your bachelorette party or bridal shower.

If it's more complicated, and you two disagree on something bigger, like the location or flowers or food, you can still work together to plan a wedding you both love. "I think design-wise, I guide my clients to look at their favorite room in the house," Fitzgerald says. "They most likely had to compromise on creating that favorite space, design-wise, so the wedding design is just taking that compromise process a step further." Really, it doesn't have to be complicated. Work together for the wedding of your dreams. Imagine ways that your love for all things modern can mesh cohesively with your partner's love for all things rustic. It can work — as long as you're both willing to be a little bit flexible.

Finally, make sure you respect each other, no matter what. "My biggest piece of advice is to listen to each other, and respect why some things may feel more important than others," Fitzgerald says. "Dancing, laughing, spending joyous moments with the ones you hold dear will overrule the little details in the long run. Focus on that!"

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