Congrats, you're engaged! While you're jumping up and down with your big pack of girls after telling them the news, you look around and realize that there's no way in hell they can all be in your wedding. By now, you may be in a slight panic mode. Selecting girls to be part of your bride tribe seems all fun — until you're trying to figure out how to pick your bridesmaids when you have a huge squad.
This sounds like a really tough task, but it's totally doable. These girls all mean so much to you, and you really don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. So, take a deep breath, and savor the moment where everyone is excited — because when it comes down to it, your special day is all about you. You are all friends, and if there's anything that you ladies have for each other, it's respect and understanding.
They all know you guys roll deep. Seriously, though — you ladies can't even all fit in one car when you go out, so I'm sure they are already peeping the idea that everyone can't be a bridesmaid. You will probably want to put it off, but it'll only be more tormenting. So, keep a few tips in mind, and the selection process should run a lot smoother.
I only say this snippet of advice because time has hardly anything to do with forming a bond with someone. If you only pick someone who you've known the longest, it's not really fair to ladies in your group who you are even closer with, but have known for a much shorter time. Time is important, but don't let that be the main deciding factor when you're choosing your bridesmaids.
Ladies, envisioning your own wedding has most likely been done before. Who do you think is really going to help you bring that enchanting vision to life? This isn't to say that everyone in your group isn't dope AF, but some possess key qualities and helping hands that will make your big day even more special.
Aside from common belief, not every woman on the face of the planet wants to be in a bridal party. It's really not for everyone. Of course, they are going to show up and support their girl on her wedding day, but try to get clued in on who wouldn't really mind not being in the bridal party.
Your bridal party isn't only there to wear the cute dresses and hook arms with the groomsmen. They're your support system and take on an important role in your wedding process.
You love all of your ladies, but you have to consider who's actually down for the responsibilities and who won't flake out. Every group has that one late friend whose whole life is basically set 30 minutes behind everyone else. It's just who she is. This is definitely something to think about before choosing the ladies for your tribe.
You may have heard some of your ladies talk about weddings and assume they wouldn't mind being in one. You might have also heard one or two of them say they don't like the whole concept of marriage. Don't assume that these are their final stances on wanting to be involved in your wedding.
A friendly competition couldn't hurt — but in this case, there wouldn't be anything friendly about it. The second you make getting a slot in your bridal party a competition, get ready for the blood, sweat, and tears. The damage to your girl pack would basically be semi-irreparable, and no one wants that.
If you aren't the first one to get engaged in your group, refrain from choosing a lady because she put you in her bridal party. I mean, you can still pick her, but don't let that be the main reason. Your other ladies might get super pissed if that's your reasoning.
Sometimes, people are quick to assume that because they aren't in the wedding party, they aren't invited at all. Continue to let everyone know that they are still invited. No one is missing out on your special day, and you couldn't imagine them not being there.
Ultimately, your ladies should be happy about your engagement and shouldn't stress you out too much about being a bridesmaid. They don't and never needed a role assigned to them to be there for you.
