I'm pretty sure the moment my boo sobbingly got down on one knee and popped the big question, my sister (aka, birthright maid of honor) was planning my bachelorette party. It was categorized as epic before it even began. In hindsight, there are a few things I wish I knew before my bachelorette party, because I'm a hopeless perfectionist and always like to feel like I'm ahead of the game.
Don't get me wrong, my bachelorette party was absolutely amazing and I have a special memory with every dope girl who made the trip with me. Blame the type-A in me, but if I could step into a time machine, I'd whisper a few heads-up tips to my recently engaged self of the past. What can I say? I'd have her back like she'd have mine. Wait, did I just refer to myself in the third-person?
Anyway, there's so much going on around the time of your bachelorette party, that when you look back, you'll wish you had done a thing or two differently. Personally, I couldn't have asked for a better bridal party. They are a major part of the keepsake memories — aside from my hubby — that are engraved in my special day and the time leading to it. Amidst all the wedding chaos, I wish I had the scoop on a couple of things before my bachelorette party.
I'm a very "do as much of a project myself" kind of person, so that I don't assign responsibilities to my friends. My bachelorette party was only weeks away from the actual wedding, and I viewed it as a time of bonding — not spilling about tasks and frustrations I still had to tend to. Opening up more at the end of the trip was the best thing I could have done, because my tribe was so efficient and helped me out majorly. I should have asked them to do more, and spilled more of my concerns, right from the get-go.
This is not at all a bad thing — it's normal. The emotions caught me off guard, because this was my first time having a bachelorette party.
The only reason I wish I knew this beforehand would be so that I could somehow mentally re-record how sentimental and real it was connecting with my girls on that level. It's hard to explain without getting choked up a bit.
At least a third of the time I was celebrating during my bachelorette party, I was shunning myself for thinking about my SO. I don't know why I perceived it as I wasn't having fun, when I totally was. Now, it seems so silly, because why would I not think about the love of my life before we made it matrimony-official?
I figured the "bride" pin and mock veil were enough to signal to people that I was marrying my idea of a knight in shining armor. Boy, was I wrong. People love those mushy details, and I was hardly ready for how many times I was asked about the when, where, why, and how by everyone I met. I love my little fairy tale, but d*mn it was exhausting.
You know how when everything is going absolutely phenomenal for you, someone — usually an ex — comes out of the woodwork and tries to drop emotional baggage on you? I wish I knew that your bachelorette party and everything involving your wedding actually, would be the gateway for their bullsh*t.
Don't let any of that get to you, because I didn't. Life goes on, and you're a living testament that it goes on well as hell.
I only say this because when it's your first time getting married and your first bachelorette party, everything is new. You're going with the flow, and those moments can never be duplicated. Sit back and take it all in, because it flies by faster than you think. No matter how much you enjoy the memories in your head, nothing beats having been there.
There's no textbook guide for the perfect bride, bridal party, or bachelorette party. You make it worth remembering however you see fit.