7 Texts To Send Your Hookup To Keep It Alive When You're Apart For The Holidays

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Well, look at you, Miss America. You finally downloaded dating apps, asked the cutie with the funniest response to "If you were a breakfast food, what would you be?" to get drinks, and had a lovely date. You started hooking up — as one does — and now you've got a regular sleepover buddy and person to text while bored at work. Excellent job. One caveat: it's December, and you and your cutie are probably going opposite directions over the holidays. The good news: you have a phone. Bonus: I have suggestions for texts to send your hookup.

Of course, every hookup is a unique snowflake, no two hookups are alike, and [insert all of all of the other disclaimers here]. The way I see it, there are three questions that you need to ask yourself before you decide if and when and what kind of texts you'd like to send your your hookup while you are apart for a few weeks.

First, is this feelings-less thing? If you and your hookup are mainly mashing bodies, and not mincing words, then the more salacious texts below are for you.

Second, is this an I'm-not-sure-about-feelings-yet thing? If you're even considering catching feels for this person, I recommend you keep things going over the holidays with some of the more moderate texts below. Why cut something off that might work?

Third: Is this an I-want-to-be-dating-already-but-we're-not thing? In this case, I highly recommend stating how you feel like, tomorrow. If that's too terrifying, you can either send loads of sweet texts over the holiday and see what kind of responses you get, or you can go radio silent and see if your hookup reaches out to you. However: Games are the worst, and you should say how you feel. OK, now that you're even more confused than you were when you started reading this article, I present to you seven texts to send to your hookup over the holiday break, in no particular order:

1. "Wanna snuggle?"

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Yes, you are not in the same vicinity as your hookup, but yes, this is adorable. I like the suggestion of snuggle because while intimate, it's also physical. This is good for those of you uncertain about what's happening with your feelings for your hookup; it's sweet but suggestive.

2. "Miss your balls, my Christmas tree's are just ornamental."

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OK, so this is very heteronormative AND you probably don't miss anyone's balls, but if you're just looking to receive a sexy text from your FWB, this should do the trick.

3. "Was Santa good to you?"

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If your hookup celebrates Christmas, what better way to say "Hi, I'm still here, what's up?" than this. It's a bit flirtatious, which is also great for those in between feelings.

4. "Hiiii, I'm more lit than the menorah."

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Suggesting that you're buzzed and looking for someone to text away the umpteenth round of Heads Up your entire extended family is making you play is a great move. Obviously, the added "i"s on the "Hi" suggest that you're having fun as well. Add a "How about you?" to the end of this text, and you should have a conversation burning in no time. (Pun semi-intended...)

5. "Is it my ski goggles or do you look like a present in your latest Insta?"

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PLEASE ONLY USE THIS IF YOU HAVE A TONGUE-IN-CHEEK SENSE OF HUMOR. This is the kind of text that a 40-year-old could send a 23-year-old and creep everyone out forever. However, if you and your hookup have an offbeat sense of humor, I think a randomly creepy line like this is hilarious. Add emojis to clarify your sarcasm-suggestion hybrid of a text.

6. "Unwrap anything good this year?

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I mean... if your hookup doesn't respond with an innuendo about unwrapping you, a condom, or a puppy, get divorced. (Just kidding.) In the same vein as "Was Santa good to you?" I like the holiday-themed, lightly sexy nature of this text.

7. "Is that a candy cane in your pocket?"

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Yes, this is for those of you out there who are totally f*cking. The silly nature of this overtly sexual text is sure to make your hookup happy to hear from you. This text will work on women too, because it's not about the shape of the candy cane, it's about the ridiculousness of this particular riff on an equally ridiculous pickup line that no ones really ever said. (Right?)

If you choose to keep the candles ablaze with your hookup by testing any of these out, please report back on how they worked. I think I'll be going with an unsolicited, "Is that a candy cane in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?" because what the heck, 'tis the season to be jolly. Happy Hookupdays!

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