College is the dressing room of life phases: You can try on a sexy LBD, a grungey plaid ensemble, or a preppy sundress all in the pursuit of discovering who you really are. You might not have discovered your "type" yet and since college is a veritable buffet of people, chances are you'll go on dates with all different types of humans in pursuit of discovering who and what you really like. There's nothing more telling about your phase of discovery than looking at the people you date in college.
We all go through phases. In fact, two of my girlfriends and I had the exact same phase in college: falling for the star of the school musical. Now, I'm not a rabid musical theater fan, but when I saw Conrad Birdie in Bye Bye Birdie, I had to date him. It turns out my friends had the same reaction and we all briefly dated our respective Birdies. Of course, the guys were not really the confident, sexy pop stars they played onstage and when we all realized the obvious we were like, "Oh, you're not really Birdie? OK, bye." While our Birdies might be telling the story of how they dated fangirls, everyone in college can relate to running into these classic personality types.
You most certainly bumped into this bro on Greek row, where he most certainly lived. He was a diehard fraternity brother, probably even a legacy recruit, and he took #GreekLife very seriously. He was tons of fun — he got you and your girls into the hottest fraternity bashes, provided free drinks, and had hilarious stories about ridiculous nights to last almost to winter break. But alas, this guy truly believes in "bros before hos," and when rush time came around, he disappeared into the vortex of hazing and chest bumping... but you'll always have those hilarious stories, though.
In high school, this fella could be found smoking cloves behind the bleachers or in the parking lot. In college, you probably found this fella smoking cloves... well, anywhere. He's rarely in class, wears man jewelry, tattoos are highly likely, and doesn't give AF — except about you. What's hotter than that? Well... When finals approach and you contract a full-blown case of being an A student, you need someone who's not too hungover to run flashcards with you for your art history exam. But until then, go bum a clove from that smoldering ne'er-do-well.
Your sensitive artist lured you in with their long hair, mysteriously sad eyes, and constant journaling. Maybe one morning after a late night poetry slam and cheap red wine, you'd wake up on their full-sized mattress on the floor of his downtown loft (of course they don't live in a dorm) to find him journaling about you. How romantic! Until they invited you to their much-hyped art show, which was actually just paintings of their mom for sale on a table at the Santa Monica Promenade. So maybe the art wasn't your style, but they certainly were... for awhile.
This person was probably an athlete, or at least a loyal fan of your college team. They had a framed photo of their perfectly symmetrical family with their smiling, perfectly symmetrical faces on their very clean dorm desk. They were always on time, always reliable, and always held the door open. They were friends with the nerds, the bros, and the professors and was just a really good person. They probably even remembered the one-year anniversary of your first date, just like you'll always remember their kindness and genuinely "like" the Instagram post of his eventual storybook wedding.
You met in the library during a particularly epic all-nighter. This person had their nose in a book, their head full of information, and was not about to let some pretty face detract from their GPA. Until they met you, of course. You convinced them to take a study break, go for a walk, grab a beer and maybe even go out on a Saturday night. Who am I kidding, they never went out. You always went over to their place, had a quiet, passionate affair, but then they went back to their true love — books. Maybe one day you'll see them featured on the Instagram account @hotdudesreading because if you know one thing, it's that they're always reading.
Oh, hello, Italian accent! This guy was everything exciting you were hoping would sashay into your life during your semester abroad. He was exotic, fun, took you to different restaurants, showed you his favorite films, and did your body right. He smelled good, swore in another language and was just exciting and unlike anyone you'd ever met. Hopefully, your chemistry transitioned from passionate lovers to dedicated pen-pals. Ciao, mi amore.
So when you took these personality types into your proverbial dressing room perhaps you just had a hot make-out sesh or maybe you discovered they were a perfect fit. Either way, shout-out to college for being the perfect phase in your life to give everyone, even Conrad Birdie, a spin.
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