Breaking up is hard to do, whether or not you're the one doing the dumping. Even if the breakup was mutual, it can still feel like your heart is in a million pieces. If you just went through a breakup, remember there's a future out there that consists of more than scraping the bottom of a pint of Chunky Monkey. I'm serious; pause The Notebook and get out a pen and paper. Wipe away your tears and write down some old school New Year's resolutions to make if you're single. Then, actually follow through with them. Do your best to pursue these goals and your future self will thank you. If you need some inspiration, here are six resolutions that are all about healing.
Self-care is way easier said than done. Trust me, I know. If you're anything like me, chances are all you want to do right now is wallow in bed and shut out the world. Well, guess what? You're entitled to do so — for a short period of time. After a day or two of feeling sorry for yourself, though, it's time to look toward a fresh start — and there's no better time to #liveyourbestlife than the new year. You don't need to be OK, you just need to keep moving forward.
Getting over heartbreak can be one of the hardest things in the world. So it's a good thing you're strong AF.
Resolution #1: I will focus on self-care.
Put on a face mask, listen to your guilty pleasure album, get out your sketchbook — whatever it is you love to do, take time to yourself and do it. Not only will this serve as a distraction and help get your mind off your ex, but it will remind you of your own passions, which are so easily pushed aside in a relationship.
Resolution #2: I will reach out to friends and family.
It's common to push people away when you're hurting, so resolve not to do that. Talking about your breakup isn't fun, and you might not feel better immediately afterwards. In the long run, though, accepting help from your loved ones does expedite the healing process. So when your girlfriends ask what's wrong, don't revert to saying, "I'm fine." Take this opportunity to talk about what you're going through, because you deserve it. Focus on the feelings you're experiencing, rather than venting about your ex's negative traits.
Resolution #3: I will practice healthy habits.
If you hate running, I'm not telling you to hit the treadmill. Maybe try yoga or meditation instead. And you don't need to go on some crazy, post-breakup diet. Just do your best not to use food to make you feel better. The healthier you are, the happier you'll be. It's science — just ask Elle Woods.
Resolution #4: I will take the high road.
Bad-mouthing your ex (to their face and/or behind their back) might feel good in the moment, but you'll likely regret it later. To prevent an awkward apology down the line, just don't do it. Resolve to take the high road when it comes to dealing with your breakup, no matter how petty your ex's actions may be.
Resolution #5: I will not idealize the relationship.
It's so easy to only remember the good aspects of a past relationship, especially as more and more time goes by. I am the worst when it comes to this. While reliving the painful moments isn't fun, it's important to stay grounded in reality. Do your best to accurately remember the relationship as it was. Acknowledge the good times, but don't ignore the very real issues that eventually led to your breakup.
Resolution #6: I will put myself back out there (when I'm ready).
I wouldn't advise jumping back into the dating scene right away, because what if you meet someone great, but you're still not over your ex? You don't want to sabotage what could potentially be a real relationship by going on dates before you're ready. That being said, sometimes all you need is a good, old-fashioned rebound. As long as you don't confuse sex with love, by all means, go for it.
Breakups suck, period. It takes time to get over someone, no matter how the relationship ended. By sticking to these resolutions, though, you can kick heartbreak's ass and live your best life in 2018.
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