The Bachelorette is back to "do the damn thing," and I'm reminded that it's a show full of terrible date ideas. I don't want to go fishing in a pool, I don't want to go on group dates with many suitors, and I don't want to get dunked on. I also definitely don't want to be filmed on a date, which is why I stick to regular, old fashioned drinks dates. Drink dates are my favorite because they're simple. Hot take: The worst first date ideas are the most creative ones.
I am a bit of a grouch, but I actually stand by this opinion. Getting overly creative for a first date is a sure way to make someone feel uncomfortable, especially in the age of dating apps and casual flings. Overzealously planning a first date is also a really easy way to end up disappointed if this person you've swiped on turns out to be less of a soulmate and more of a sucker.
Going out for drinks or grabbing coffee are perfect first dates because they are quick and easy. The round of beverages sets a finite amount of time for you and a stranger to see if you connect or not, plus it's hard to get spinach in your teeth if you're just sipping a bev. (Unless you're drinking a bespoke cocktail with lavender in it or something.) A drinks date also presents a relatively low chance of injury — unlike horseback riding or hot yoga. (I have heard of a friend being invited to hot yoga on a date, and I'll never understand.)
I know this is a going to be a controversial opinion, but I don't understand the appeal of a dinner date for the first date, especially when it comes to meeting up with someone you met online or on an app. First off, I am weirdly uncomfortable eating around people I don't know. I don't know what it is, but I get extremely self-conscious, and become hyper aware of every bite I take. I also have beef with dinner as a first date because dinner takes a long time. What if you end up on a date with a dud? Or someone offensive? Or a serial killer? I like to be able to have the possibility of a quick exit when meeting strangers whose faces I swiped on my phone. End of rant.
Movies are dark, and thus made extremely adorable first dates in middle school when we couldn't go out to dinner or drinks. However, I usually like to have conversation and get to know my date the first time we meet up. And even if you have drinks planned before or after the showing, a movie represents far too much time sitting next to a stranger in the dark. What if they smell? Or what if they're someone who checks their texts during a movie? Hard pass.
Cute in theory, difficult in reality. I don't know why people are always going ice skating on first dates in movies, but they are. There's too much potential for either your date or you being terrible on ice and dragging the other one down. Plus, a first date is way too early to hold hands. Sorry for being a grinch.
Museum-going is another first date idea that's good in theory, but terrible in reality unless you two met in an Art History class. Museums are quiet, and whispering about the art on a very first date feels pretentious. Save this for date number three.
Concerts are loud, and it's too hard to hear your date speak, let alone get to know them. Plus, inviting someone to a concert for a first date if you don't even know if they like concerts feels presumptuous. And dancing and/or head-bobbing is just too awkward to navigate on a very first date. Date two or later.
If you have to get creative, get ice cream or stroll through a park. Because sometimes, you know within five minutes of meeting someone that you're talking to a slow-hand-to-thigh-reach-at-the-movies creeper. No thank you.
