It's no surprise that your 20s may not play out how you originally thought it would. It's a decade that varies from person to person, and there's no concrete road map that's guiding you. It's all a learning process, and of course, there are a few lessons that aren't as transparent as the rest. (I know, how could the world hold out on you?) Sooner or later, you'll uncover more than a few secrets about your 20s, and wonder why the heck no one clued you in on them before.
To be honest, these secrets don't really dawn on you until you're well into your 20s. ("Secrets" sounds very much like some scoop your friends knew all along and didn't share with you.) But in actuality, they simply forgot to share the 4-1-1 once they had a revelation.
I mean, can you blame them? Trying to get a solid handle on your 20s requires so much undivided attention. No one's sitting back, taking notes, and hosting lecture halls to tell the everyone else how to slay their 20s. You might have been in the dark for a little bit, but you won't be a stranger to these 10 secrets for long.
1. There Isn't One "Right" Way To Live Your 20s
There are no guidelines telling you which is the right or wrong way to go through your 20s. Society might have some expectations for what you should have accomplished by a certain age, but that doesn't mean you need to follow them.
2. Most People Don't Have Everything Figured Out Yet
Some people are skillful at making it look like they have everything under control. Believe it or not, many of your 20-something friends are trying to figure out what they want to do with the rest of their lives, too. You are in no way alone in this decade of adulting.
3. A Small Friend Group Doesn't Mean You Lack Friends
Don't panic if the size of your circle has reduced. That isn't a sign that you've become anti-social. You're more receptive to the people you surround yourself with. Quality over quantity, am I right?
4. It's Not Weird If You Don't Feel Like An Adult Immediately
Personally, I'll be a big kid until the end of my days. It takes a while for you to truly feel like an adult. Just because you're 18 or 21, that doesn't mean you immediately start feeling those grown-up vibes and want to meet up for tea and talk about setting up a 401k. You grow up, but it's not all at once.
5. Roadblocks Are Inevitable
In my opinion, your 20s is a learning curve. There are so many firsts involved, including successes and roadblocks. Every hurdle you experience will no doubt provide a lesson that you can apply next time around.
6. There's A Beyoncé Lyric For Just About Everything You Go Through
OK, I'm sure no one will tell you that Beyoncé has your back for practically every turbulent portion of your 20s. Going through a break-up? Let that "Irreplaceable" track soothe your heart. Need a boost of confidence? Well, you have dozens of gems to choose from.
7. It's OK If You Still Don't Know What You Want To Do
The classes you take and degrees you pursue definitely point you in a direction, but they're not final. They don't decide who you are or who you have to be. You decide.
8. You Need A Day Designated For Yourself
On the one hand, you should be spreading your wings and embracing all kinds of new experiences. On the other, you also need to practice the art of enjoying your own company. It should be a priority to work some "me time" into your busy schedule.
9. You Can Totally Have A Mentor
Guidance and questions are key factors of your 20s. You don't have to get all Karate Kid or anything, but having a mentor you look up to is so beneficial. You can pick their brain, even if they're in a different field than you, and they'll likely offer up some golden advice.
10. Don't Be Afraid To Wander Outside Your Comfort Zone
OK, before you coin me as a onesie hater or tea basher, hear me out. Your comfort zone is a tricky concept in your 20s. You have every right to be comfortable, but that shouldn't deter you from stepping outside of your zone, if you want to. Be an explorer in all aspects of your life, even if it's a trip from the couch to your balcony.
Every day is an opportunity to learn something new about your 20s. There's no secret about that.