No One Can Stop Laughing At Dedication To Figuring Out Trump's Fear Of Stairs

by John Haltiwanger

On Wednesday morning, CNN discussed what is clearly an extremely vital issue we should all dedicate far more time to: Is Donald Trump afraid of stairs?

Obviously, this is far more important than the fact that the FBI is investigating whether or not Trump's campaign colluded with Russia to influence the 2016 election, or the fact that the GOP healthcare plan he's promoting could rob millions of people of their health insurance.

America is basically a massive dumpster fire right now, but screw it, let's talk about Donald Trump versus stairs.

This is why we can't have nice things.

Is Trump afraid of stairs?

Who really knows?

Who really cares? Well, CNN does, apparently.

For those who are curious as to why this is even a discussion, it's all because of a conspiracy theory that says the president held the hand of British Prime Minister Theresa May when she visited the White House because of his alleged stairs phobia.

But there's no concrete evidence the president is afraid of stairs -- much like there's no actual evidence Obama ever wiretapped Trump.

May recently addressed these rumors in an interview with Vogue.

She said,

I think he was actually being a gentleman. We were about to walk down a ramp, and he said it might be a bit awkward.

The real news here is that a woman actually called Trump a gentleman. Sounds like alternative facts, if you ask me.

To be fair, stairs can definitely be dangerous.

But this is exactly why people don't like the media right now.

There are so many things we could discuss about Trump, and many valid things to criticize about him -- things that have nothing to do with stairs.

Maybe he's afraid of stairs, but his apparent fear of Muslims, refugees and people of color is way more concerning.