So the other morning my friend enlightened me that flavored Chobanis have three times the carbs of regular Chobanis. OMG. Flavored Chobanis = the enemy. The trendy yogurt that you thought was part of the perfect diet plan isn’t acceptable unless it’s plain and tastes like you’re eating straight up sour cream. Sh*t.
Then, the next day, my friend thought she found the solution! If you put a sour apple in your plain Chobani, then you get the flavor without all the extra carbs and it totally tastes like your favorite fro-yo. Thank God. But wait…we just realized that apples have more carbs than any other fruit… started from the bottom, now we’re back at the bottom. I never thought I would have such a headache over a goddamn yogurt.
I’m giving up. I used to be the girl who made fun of other girls for eating salads and now, I’m that girl. I guess that’s mother nature’s way of welcoming me to my 20s. Thanks, but no thanks. If I want to eat a f*cking low fat flavored yogurt, sue me. Seriously, we have all become psychopaths about eating.
We spend so much time worrying about how many carbs and grams of sugar are in every single food we choose to eat, but then drown ourselves in a rough estimate of 1,000 calories worth of alcohol daily. It’s no wonder why everytime we’re drunk, the first thing we run to is a sandwich because most women deprive themselves of one when they're sober.
Get the f*ck over it. Live a little. If you aren’t happy with your body, exercise and eat healthy. It isn’t rocket science. Weigh out your priorities. Losing three pounds by starving yourself for a month < enjoying your life. I hate to say it, but YOLO. When you’re old and wrinkly, you’re going wonder why the hell you wasted your youth worrying relentlessly about your weight.
You aren’t nearly as fat as you think you are and, just like the saying goes, “there’s always going to be someone prettier than you,” there is also always going to be someone skinnier than you (and someone fatter.) Nobody else but you cares if you're five pounds heavier than you'd like to be. Anybody who judges you for that is not worth your time. If your weight defines who you are, then you need to work on yourself.
Food is the one thing that everyone in the world likes. It’s the one thing everyone has in common. It brings us together. Learn to accept yourself for who you are. Dieting only goes so far, the rest comes down to genetics and exercise. If you have trouble accepting that, you probably have issues and are surrounding yourself with the wrong people. You know you love food -- stop neglecting it.
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