If you aren't currently in the know (and I mean, you totally should be, unless you've been living under a rock the past couple of weeks), a total solar eclipse will shed its magic across the sky today. Get your eclipse glasses ready for a spectacular sight, because this celestial event is kind of a big deal. How to celebrate this rare occasion, might you ask? With Tinder, of course. I conducted a hilarious social experiment where I used "Total Eclipse of the Heart" lyrics on Tinder, in honor of today's solar eclipse. In case you were wondering, you can cue my internal dread now, please.
For your entertainment (and, OK, partially mine, too), I happily took to Tinder to pester the single men in my area. TBH, I'm pretty picky on Tinder, mostly because online dating gives me the creeps, so to up my response time, I lowered my standards (you're welcome). It was also 9 a.m., so the response time was a little lower than at other times of the day. Once we matched, I messaged them random lyrics to "Total Eclipse of the Heart," which is definitely up there for "Creepiest Song Ever" in my book. And boy, do most of these guys seriously not know this song. Here are some of my favorite responses. You're welcome.
1. The Guy Who Was Totally Unfazed
I mean, you have to give this guy some major props. He obviously didn't care that I might potentially be a hardcore weirdo who talks like this on a daily basis; he just wanted to play his game. I tried another lyric, but he decided not to bite.
2. The Guy Who Played Along... Creepily
OK, at first, I thought, "Hey! Brandon got it! Nice going, dude." Then, he had to ruin it by un-ironically referencing said creepy song. I fired back another lyric, but he wasn't up for playing the game. But, it seems like he really enjoys 80s music.
3. The Guy Who Was Really, Really Clueless
Awe man, Ethan. I even went ahead and gave him some of the most well-know lyrics, and... no dice. Plus, can we talk about how much he was willing to put up with? He let me get in way too many lines of this song. Dude must have been bored AF.
4. The Skeptical Guy
Obviously, this Tinder match cannot be bothered with cheesy lyrics. He's here for a reason, people, and it's not to let me serenade him with "Total Eclipse of the Heart." After this, he just asked me what's up, though, so he seems pretty normal-ish.