I'm moving to New York City in less than a month, and it's about time I admitted I'm scared as hell. By “scared as hell,” I mean that leaving the state of Florida – where I've lived my entire life – and throwing away the routine I fashioned for myself in Miami legitimately terrifies me.
I've wanted to move to New York for years. I've daydreamed about it more than I can remember. Who honestly doesn't dream about moving to the city? Even though I've seen myself there in so many affirmations, I don't think I ever really believed it would happen. I still don't believe it, and it's actually happening as we speak.
I am about to leave a comfortable life. Everything fits into place, the sun shines the entire year, there are yachts outside my office, my best friends are nearby, I might see a dolphin on the walk over to them and my family is just a few hours away.
I'm about to leave something that is pretty fantastic. I say this mostly because I'm scared to leave it. Even as I write this, the thought of, “What the hell are you doing?” is looming. Deep down, I know what I'm doing, though.
I comprehend my motivation for taking this chance. But, it doesn't make me any less afraid. I am following my dreams, but that doesn't mean my dreams aren't scary.
While my move to New York City is giving me massive anxiety, I know there is plenty to look forward to. So, in order to prevent an oncoming panic attack, I decided to think of every reason I can't wait to move:
- I love rooftops. There's just something about the view that makes you feel like you're on top of the world (in more ways than one).
- There's quicker and cheaper travel to Europe. So long, expensive flights abroad. I already found a $400 round-trip ticket to visit my family in Poland this November. I can't wait to use this international hub to my advantage.
- There are so many networking opportunities. Everybody's a somebody in New York City. While I'm really looking forward to networking professionally, I'm also truly looking forward to hearing people's individual stories outside of their resumes.
- I have another shot at dating. So, dating in Miami was fun, but it was wholly unsuccessful. I'm really excited to see what the New York dating scene has to offer. I even got a head start.
- I'm excited to lose all my money on an apartment. This isn't sarcasm, I swear. I'm actually eager to learn about what I truly need and appreciate in order to fit in my small space. I'll take the experience of living in NYC over money any day.
- I will be saving money by leaving my car. The subway system terrifies me, but driving in Miami did, too. I'll be sad to leave my car in Florida, but happy to save money on car insurance. I will actually walk places.
- I like winter (for like, maybe a day or two). I love snow. But, I've also never been in it for longer than one week. Check in with me next January when the pretty holiday lights come down.
- I can't wait to taste test through NYC. First things first, I'll need to try all the pizzas. Second comes the bagels. Then comes what dreams are made of.
- I'm going to pretend to be Carrie Bradshaw. (I'm coming for you, Mr. Big.)
- I want to get out of my comfort zone. New York makes or breaks someone, and I plan on breaking apart until I make myself whole. I want to know what I was missing before I learned to take a chance on myself.
- I'd love to be a tourist for as long as I can. I think I'll have a little bit of leeway to be slightly obnoxious. But hey, you don't move to NYC for the first time every day, so bring on the basic bucket list.
- But, I also want to become a local. I know I just contradicted myself. I've been a tourist in New York plenty of times, but I've never been a true local. I've never been able to call it home. I've never had an address or known how to use public transport. I'm excited to learn about the city outside of its typical tourist traps.
- One way or another, I know I'll fall in love, even if it's with the city streets and rooftops instead of another human being. But let's be real: I'm definitely hoping to meet a unicorn in the concrete jungle.
I'm scared AF for NYC, but I've never been so excited to face my fears before. See you soon where dreams are made.