This Is What Your Noisy Upstairs Neighbors Are Actually Doing

You know all those mysterious sounds your upstairs neighbors make during each and every hour of the day? Are they breakdancing? Are they having sex on top of an mechanical bull?

It's always been impossible to know for sure -- until now.

We have uncovered documentary footage of the Upstairs Neighbors in their natural habitat, and we can now catch an unprecedented glimpse into the mind and manner of the mysterious creatures.

In fact, they are not so different from you and me.

Except that they live to torture and confuse us. But we knew that already.

And by the way, yes, those were bowling balls you thought you heard.