'Grown Man' Cries Over Pokémon Go In Hilariously Emotional Snap Story
To be clear, this is actually a video of a grown man pretending to cry about Pokémon Go, not actually crying about Pokémon Go.
Well, maybe I'm wrong about that. Most people do take their Pokémon Go more seriously than they take their jobs, and jobs make you cry all the time.
But I'm pretty sure this is just a video of a hilarious dude who professes to be exactly 67 percent drunk pretending to not be able to handle the pressures of "catching 'em all."
He specifically seems caught up on whether or not Pokémon are more scarce at night because they are sleeping. Now, luckily, I did my minor in Pokémon biology, so I can say with 100 percent certainty that, yes, unless it is a nocturnal Pokémon, these cute beasts rest at night in order to have more energy to brutally assault each other with during the day.
P.S. Anyone who says they wish Pokémon training was real, it is. We just call it by the name dog fighting. And it is illegal.
P.P.S. Hi, Michael Vick! I bet you're playing Pokémon Go right now.