No offense at all meant to Garrett Clayton, who took on the icon role of Link Larkin in NBC's live performance of "Hairspray Live!" on Wednesday night.
The 25-year-old actor is known for playing Tanner in "Teen Beach Movie," a 2013 Disney Channel Original Movie I was definitely too old to watch but definitely watched anyhow.
But as impressive as his eyebrows were, Garrett's Link Larkin just could not live up to what I consider Zefron's glory days in the 2007 "Hairspray" film.
I mean, here's Link's introduction from NBC's live production last night.
This intro is supposed to be the sexiest, most fangirl worthy moment of ALL TIME, but instead it kind of falls flat.
Meanwhile, here's Zefron's legendary entrance from the 2007 film.
SEE WHAT I MEAN?
The adjustment of his cuff! The casual-but-not-at-all-casual sexy smolder! The artfully place single curl on his forehead!
Zac Efron was born to play Link, and there's just no way to live up to that.
So while fans were loving Jennifer Hudson slay up the stage as Motormouth Maybelle and Harvey Fierstein absolutely nailing Edna Turnblad, most of us spent a lot of the show wistfully longing for the ever-charismatic Zefron.
Again, we aren't blaming Garrett. He was just tasked with the impossible.
You know Zefron's good when he's trending during a live show he's not even in.
We just missed him a whole lot, OK!?
Can you blame us? LOOK HOW PERFECT!
And yes, I do feel a little guilty about doing this to Garrett.
But, you know, maybe this one is really on him for not being Zac Efron.
Well, at least we had Jennifer Hudson absolutely slaying as Motormouth, both in her duet at the end in that golden jumpsuit and especially during her solo, "I Know Where I've Been."
Phew. I'm still recovering from that one.
And as for Zefron, I'll just watch my "Hairspray" DVD for the hundredth time and scream at my television like a regular Tracy Turnblad.