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Taylor Swift Didn't Release New Album, Just A Poster

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Taylor Swift's record label needs a little lesson in managing expectations, mmkay?  MMKAY, Universal Music?? MMKAY, TAY???

The secret to managing expectations is specifics.

Yes, you need to keep things vague enough that there's still something to get excited about, but a tweet promising simply “a surprise” Swifties would “not want to miss” might as well read,

TAYLOR'S ABOUT TO DROP AN ALBUM WITH ZERO NOTICE, LIKE BEYONCÉ. JUST TRY KEEPING YOUR COOL. YOU WON'T.

But you did it anyway.

Hey #Swifties, we've got a surprise for you tomorrow. Follow us now and check back for something you'd not want to miss! pic.twitter.com/omvFlUlM6w — Universal Music SG (@universalmusg) November 3, 2016

Fans' minds obviously darted straight to the possible rogue release of Taylor's sixth album.

@laughoutloud_13 @universalmusg TS6?!?! pic.twitter.com/6Km0pZbhKC — ba-hum-bug paint (@itshannah_marie) November 3, 2016
@universalmusg omg TS6? ;) pic.twitter.com/BBuijHEUi2 — Rachel Colley (@AllTimeSwift13) November 3, 2016
@universalmusg pic.twitter.com/2NLXP8SOrj — alaina (@pulledoutaring) November 3, 2016

Sadly, Universal's promises were empty, and all the label had to offer was a damn poster.

Here you go #Swifties: Celebrate #10YearsOfTaylorSwift with us by winning merchandise! https://t.co/duH9otf9TX pic.twitter.com/bPglTGQ5dp — Universal Music SG (@universalmusg) November 4, 2016

What… the… hell is this? We don't want this.

Swifties were saddened, but ultimately not too stunned by the let down.

@finallyclean13 @universalmusg pic.twitter.com/QlXHT69fCG — holmen (@gomezswifts) November 3, 2016
@universalmusg release the damn album pic.twitter.com/sSSLOHPnAL — elena (@sswiftstyles) November 4, 2016
@thiagomussi13 @universalmusg pic.twitter.com/91XXyiRV7B — +Spooky Gui+ (@Mcunicorn13) November 4, 2016

To add insult to injury, the merch is only available to those who purchase one of Tay's album on iTunes and provide proof of the transaction.

Universal Music

UM, BUHSCUSE US? We already HAVE all those albums. We want a NEW album. We want TS6.

We are young and poor, but we're not idiots, for the most part. If you want more of our money, Universal, you're not getting it with the same crap you already sold us.

YES, FINE, THAT'S A REALLY NICE POSTER.

But if you're looking for fresh cash, you'd better give us fresh music, or we're going to make sure that tiny child from “America's Got Talent” burns Tay's career to the ground.

LOL, JK! Give us the album.

Citations: Taylor Swift's Reps Promise A Mysterious Surprise & Fans Are Freaking Out (Refinery 29)