Here Are 6 Ways To Tell If Your New Hookup Is Actually Relationship Material
I think the old-school relationship is dead. These days, it seems like all relationships start out as hookups and no other way. However, the trouble is that usually, one person wants to turn it into something more, while the other one is just fine coasting along and leaving the hookup the way it is.
But there are glimmers of hope. Look at Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher. Now married, the two started off in a weird sibling-type relationship on the set of "That '70s Show," then turned into friends with benefits and eventually decided they wanted to be exclusive with each other (they are SUCH #relationshipgoals, it's not even funny). Mila says the reason they work together so well is because they know the "good, the bad and the ugly" about each other and still love each other.
Now, I'm not saying you should go into your hookup hoping it'll turn into something more. But there are definitely signs your hookup could be a good long-term prospect.
Here are six ways to tell if he's relationship material. If he does these things, I think you're solid (and if he doesn't, it's time to find another hookup):
1. He isn't afraid to take you to nice places.
He won't just show you off to his friends -- he'll take you out to brunch (not just the morning after you've hooked up, but other days, too), invite you to things that aren't parties (like sports games or music events) and other things that interest him.
It's pretty obvious: If he enjoys spending time with you and enjoys doing stuff he loves with you and no one else IRL, he's a keeper.
2. He opens up to you sober.
I once had a hookup buddy who only spilled his guts to me when he was drunk. I mistakenly took this for someone who actually trusted me, but alcohol was the catch because when we were sober, he was completely emotionally closed off. Yeah, it really messed with my head.
If your dude likes to air things out emotionally even when you both aren't wasted AF, he could be in it for the long haul. Drunk ramblings don't count, so do not let them confuse you.
3. He always makes sure you orgasm first.
Guys who are relationship material are respectful and that includes being respectful during sex. If he doesn't give a hoot about your orgasm and stops having sex the moment he finishes, he's only in this thing for himself.
GET OUT NOW (besides, why would you want to be with someone that selfish, anyway?)
4. He checks in on you even when you're not in the bedroom together.
If he's texting you when you're not hooking up, that means he has a genuine interest in who you are as a person, not just in what you look like naked. The thing here is that he needs to be initiating the texts, not just responding to the ones you send him when you miss him or whatever.
Bonus points if he responds quickly. If he's making you wait, like, half a day to hear back from him, he is NOT relationship material. In figuring out if my hookup is BF material, I usually give him a one to two-hour grace period.
5. He'll tell you he likes something of yours IRL, not over social media.
Social media likes are very passive-aggressive. If he's "liking" your stuff over Instagram, Twitter, Facebook or whatever but not texting you or telling you about it in conversation, he simply isn't man enough to be your BF.
Liking your stuff could also be a sign he's trying to be secretive about your hookup, which isn't a good sign.
6. He knows everything about you and isn't weirded out.
This is really the key. The acceptance of each other's weirdness is the glue that continues to hold Ashton and Mila together in the midst of all these celebrity breakups in this cruel, loveless world.