I Don't Hate Men, But I'm Still Waiting For One Who Doesn't Suck

by Amy Horton

I would love to be optimistic about guys: I really would.

I have lots of guys in my life I care about, and I don't think men are horrible. However, I DO think most of them are really dumb about women almost all the time. It's hard to reconcile my feelings for my male friends and family with the bad experiences I have romantically.

I would love to think better of them. I honestly wish most guys were amazing and treated women wonderfully. In my dream world, none of us have any horror stories.

Unfortunately, that's not reality. It's difficult to like men when I not only experience their idiocy firsthand, but also hear endless stories about how badly they treat my friends.

I want to stay positive. I try to think well of guys: I really do. I want to be open-minded, hopeful and nice.


I don't want to misjudge someone who turns out to be genuinely nice. The problem is, I've had so many bad experiences.

And they just keep coming. It's very difficult not to assume the worst.

I'm hoping one proves me wrong. I hope desperately some magical, wonderful man will show up, ready to dispel all my currently held, pessimistic beliefs about the way men behave with women.

I would love nothing more. I can't wait to feel all fuzzy and happy again.

I'm just a little worried it'll never happen.

I think they are better as friends. Guys are a lot easier to deal with as buddies. They don't screw me over, and I can tell them when they're being awful.

There are no stakes involved, and so, I don't get hurt. Most of my guy friends also have girlfriends, so I don't have to worry things will get awkward.

It's easier to deal with their crap when I'm not directly affected by it.

I feel the more open I am, the less interested they are. I can't figure out why – when I'm more open to different opinions than ever before – there are no available men to be found.

It's like I've somehow lost all my appeal to the opposite sex, and I don't see why. I'm friendlier and nicer to them than I've ever been, but it appears this is a turnoff.


I feel like they only enjoy the chase. I must be too available to attract men, and they only want what they can't have.

I don't want to go through all that crap. I want to like a man who likes me back and isn't afraid to show it: end of story. I'm so tired of guys who lose interest in me as soon as I start showing some.

I treat them fairly, and then, they disappoint me. I do give them the benefit of the doubt, despite my predisposition not to trust them. But they blow it every time.

I'm doing the best I can. But it's pretty difficult to work with the most exasperating creatures ever. I always manage to give them another chance, but they soon make it clear they don't deserve it.

I ask for only the basics. But they still can't deliver.

And I'm not a needy woman. I'm independent and self-sufficient. Quite frankly, I enjoy being single.

All I want from a man are the bare bones of what a relationship requires, but I can't find one who follows through. It's beyond annoying. Where are all the men who give a damn about treating a woman well?

I can't find one who is emotionally available. It seems guys these days are sensitive and whiny as hell.

But yet, they can't open up about their feelings. What is that crap?

They get upset and defensive about every little thing, but you should forget about having an adult discussion about a relationship problem.

I don't want to waste my time and energy on that nonsense.

I'm not trying to play games. I would like to cut the crap, and I would like a man who feels the same.

I don't want to pull all this dating bullshit, where you have to pretend you don't like each other in order to have a chance with one another.

Screw. That. Life is too short, and I have way too much to do.

If I don't find that elusive mature man, I'll stay single.

I'm no longer willing to settle. It's better to live my life alone and happy than dissatisfied in a bad relationship.

I would love for a non-sucky guy to come my way. But if not, so be it. I'll just keep on doing me and trying not to hate men, in spite of all my bad luck.

Someday, maybe one will treat me the way I deserve.