4 Questions To Ask Yourself Before You Swipe Left On Someone And Lose Them Forever

by Alison Segel

I'm a chronic left swiper when it comes to Tinder, and I pretty much do it without reason. I don't know what it is. Maybe it's some deep-rooted fear of commitment, but all I know is I need some sort of guide book on swiping. When online dating, it's always hard to know if you should you swipe left on a person and never see them again, or swipe right and take a chance on love.

Sometimes, fear or judgement disguised as standards can get us to swipe left too readily. You might think someone is too good for you or out of your league, so you swipe left to protect yourself from rejection before it even happens. What would that male model who's also a neuroscientist want with me anyway? Other times, someone might have one bad picture or a joke that turns us off in their bio, and we immediately dismiss a potential connection with them. They're only 5'9"? SWIPE LEFT! They've been to Burning Man? No, thank you!

But here are some questions to ask yourself before you swipe left on someone and lose them forever. Because you want to be sure you're making the right decision, or you might lose your soulmate forever.

1. Will You Keep Thinking About Them?

If someone is going to be on your mind long after you swipe left on them, then take a chance and swipe right. The worst thing you can do for yourself is miss out on a potentially great opportunity, especially one you'll be thinking about far after it's gone. If you're on the fence about someone, give it a shot and make your decision after a first date, instead of before.

2. Are They The Hottest Person You've Ever Seen?

Davide Illini

Sometimes, you gotta just swipe based on lust. You ever see a super hot guy on public transportation, and then try to find them on social media based on zero information, just because they were that hot? Occasionally, you will find that on Tinder, too.

Your first inclination might be to swipe left. What will I have in common with this male model? Can they form sentences or have a conversation? Well, don't judge a book by its very hot cover, especially a cover that you will probably be thinking about later. Just swipe right. See what happens. At the very least, you could get a fun hookup.

3. Are You Letting Your Insecurities Dictate Your Swiping?

Sometimes, I swipe left on people because I think that they are out of my league. Maybe I perceive that they're more attractive than I am or are more established in their career. I'll think they're definitely going to swipe left on me, so why even give it a shot?

Those are just my insecurities and fear talking, and they will get me nowhere when it comes to dating and love. You never know what anyone's type is, but I can tell you one thing: Everyone's type is confidence. So if you see someone you like, then swipe right — always. Don't let your own doubts about yourself get in the way of a potential relationship.

4. Could There Be Potential?


Maybe you're not blown away by a profile, but could you be blown away in person or on a first date? Listen, my dating profile isn't great. I hardly give any information away in my bio, and for some reason, I'm wearing a hat in every single one of my pictures — and I never wear hats in real life. I'm also never smiling in any of my photos, which is something I am definitely known to do IRL.

Tinder profiles aren't the best indicator of who someone might be in real life. So if you think there could be potential for a relationship, don't be dismissive and swipe left based off one unflattering photo or a weird line in a bio. We're not all perfect online. It's being great in real life that matters.

So if you're on the fence about whether or not to swipe left on someone, you might as well just swipe right. Life's too short to be insanely cautious with your heart. Be bold, and take a risk — you never know what will happen.

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