Relationships

How To Own Your Interracial Relationship In A World That's Divided

by Jasmine Vaughn-Hall

The world is our playground... but if you've ever found yourself in an interracial relationship, you probably learned the hard way how everyone isn't always the nicest at the jungle gym.

People may stare and say mean things. It's literally just childhood antics all over again. We've all heard about the elephant in the room, but have possibly not experienced being the actual elephant.

Being in an interracial relationship can seem like that sometimes because people make it that way. If you've ever found your interracial relationship in a room of judgers, keep these things in mind:

1. Own it.

Owning it is very important. The more you feed into the unnecessary judging unfolding around you, the more you give other people power in your relationship.

You could go crazy trying to interpret a person's unneeded hate and loathing toward you. Strut your stuff and just own it.

2. Shut it out.

Our parents were right when they said sticks and stones may break our bones, but words will never hurt us.

If people don't have anything nice to say about your relationship, just ignore them.

No one likes a negative Nancy, and you have more important and positive things to think about... like your significant other.

It only takes two to tango, so leave the wallflowers on their own miserable dance floor. Giving any extra energy to unexplained disapproval will only leave you spent and exhausted.

3. Don't adjust.

Don't EVER change how you act with your significant other just because you're afraid it will make people feel uncomfortable. Don't appease someone's illegitimate thinking. If you guys hold hands, do it because the two of you are all that matters.

Besides, people need to be made uneasy in situations like these; it will give them a chance to climb out of their small, boxed-in minds and realize love is love.

If you change how you are with your significant other in fear, you're closeting the very things keeping you together: love and dedication.

4. Don't explain yourself.

Let's say on the off-chance someone wants to address your interracial relationship in public: Do not feel the need to explain yourself.

Why do you need to comfort someone else's ignorance?

Do you gain anything? Also, some people are unchangeable.

So, no matter what you say about why the two of you are together, it won't make a difference.

You can't change people at the end of the day: People change when they want to.

5. Just love.

It's true: Love trumps hate. If you strip yourself of race, you're just a human being loving another human being.

And that's beautiful. Love is fearless, and it embodies strength. If you wear love on your sleeve, it won't even matter when people try to mentally drain you or strip you of your happiness.

Just keep pushing and working on what matters.

Studio Firma

No one likes being the elephant in the room, but it's other people who place you there.

But if you consider the idea that the elephant is just something that stands out, it's fine.

Who wants to be normal anyway? It's overrated.