If I could have any superpower, I would like the ability to read peoples' minds. (Teleportation is a close second.) As an avid over-analyzer and paranoid human woman who assumes people are thinking the very worst about her at all times, I think mind reading — if painful —would actually calm me down. I could kiss the days of trying to figure out who's mad at me via Venmo feed goodbye. Think about it: Rather than reading an article about signs he's falling out of love with you, wouldn't you rather just know?
Here's the deal, though: We live in the real world and mind reading isn't, well, real. If your partner isn't in love with you anymore, they should grow a pair of balls or ovaries and break up with you. (Wow! What a novel idea.) Usually people aren't this rational and straightforward, and that sucks. To be fair, crushing the soul of someone you once loved is uncomfortable AF. It's much easier to stick around passive aggressively until your relationship detonates. How fun, amiright?
Time for some tough love, cuties. If you are wondering if your partner is falling out of love with you, they probably are. Or, they probably aren't the right match for you. In a healthy relaysh, you should be confident in your SO's love for you. On the other hand, you could be totes paranoid like me and your partner could be on the level, and you're just on your worst "read too much into everything" behavior. I got you.
Here are some telltale signs your babe is actually falling out of love with you (I'm sorry):
1. They Seem Distant
I know, be more vague, RIGHT? Point taken, so let me be clear: If your partner is going through a tough time at work or having a hard time with a loss or major change in their life, they may be distant even if they love you. Keeping quiet, seeming withdrawn, and spending more time alone are all totally normal things to feel during tough times in life.
If the lack of communication and gruffness lasts for a long time, or doesn't seem to be changing at all, however, your partner may be distancing him or herself because they are no longer interested in the relationship. Remember that time you fell out of love with that other person? Didn't you slowly pull away over time? Yeah. Major bummer, but a major sign of a shift. Talk to your partner about why they seem so distant.
2. They Don't Make Time For You
This could fall under the "seeming distant" umbrella, but time is much more specific and measurable. While passion in a relationship can fade, making quality time— so, not watching Ezra Koenig's weird new Netflix anime show Neo Yokio — is something partners who care about each other should always be able to do. If you are in a loving relationship, you show up for your partner when it counts.
If the amount time your partner spends with you changes substantively, again, it could have to do with an outside factor like a new job, or it could be that your partner is avoiding you. (I know, it's awful, and I'm sending hugs.) If your gut is telling you that the time your partner is making for you versus the time you make for your partner is imbalanced, your partner could be struggling in your relationship. Again, TALK TO THEM. I insist because I don't know your relationship or partner, and I speak for them as to whether they still love you or not.
3. They Avoid Physical Intimacy
Again, not a deal breaker that guarantees your partner is no longer in love with you, but not a great sign. If your partner has been avoiding getting physical — whether when it comes to sex or simply small gestures like a touch on the back — they are creating more space between the two of you, which might mean they aren't feeling that "ponies and rainbows"-love anymore. Dry spells are real, so I don't think you should accuse them of pulling away the first time they roll over and say "not tonight," but I do think if the lack of touch continues, there's something going on.
I'll echo chamber myself and say it again: If you are not sure where your partner is at, in regards to love or anything in your relationship, talk to them. Talking is a great tool us humans have that allows us to shut our imaginations down and open our mouths to get clear on the facts of a situation. If your partner is lost and falling out of love, they might need an opening to express it. It's not fair, but it's reality. And wouldn't you rather move on sooner rather than later? Before you go there, though, TALK TO THEM. Protect your heart. And finally, have a great weekend.
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