That street harassment reign just won't let up, huh? Apparently not. Women have begun to go to some nuptial-centered measures to get guys to take that not-so-god-awful word "no" more seriously. The "I have a boyfriend" excuse used to be a go-to phrase, but women have taken it up another notch, since it seems to matter less and less to f*ckboys. Now, the new method to try out involves an engagement ring.
That's right, people. In 2017, it's no longer enough for a woman to be "taken" by a man. And it was never enough for a woman to merely not be interested. Instead, women have started wearing engagement rings to insinuate they are in a "serious" relationship, in hopes that guys will at least respect that road to marriage that another man is on.
Mackenzi Guptill, who works at a hotel, shared a close-up photo of her ring finger, but the post wasn't one of those social media announcements about her love life taking a sweet new step.
Instead, Guptill shared the photo with a story about how she began wearing the ring to ward off a guy who visited her hotel.
She described one of his routine stop-and-talk days in her post that reads, in part,
Last week he comes in while I'm working. We talk about books, he brings me another one, everything went like it usually did. Except then he proceeds to get personal and ask me 'so do you have a boyfriend?' This question totally threw me off. I told him I did, that we had been together for roughly 3 years. He then said 'well I didn't see a ring so I just assumed' which, okay I get. But it was the fact that for the next 20-30 minutes he still stood there and sort of tried to plead his case: telling me I was so smart, and intelligent, and how I could edit his book because of my major, and 'well no ring?'. Then it was a constant 'you should call me if things go bad' and just this lingering 'won't leave you alone' vibe.
Guptill also didn't feel comfortable with telling him how uncomfortable he made her. She wrote,
It was all sorts of wrong and I wanted so badly to tell him to fuck off and never come back. HOWEVER, I was at work. I need this job. And the fear of getting fired for yelling at some guy was definitely present in my mind. And I thought 'he hasn't DONE anything physical, he's just talking too much and too creepy.' Finally he left but not without telling me he would definitely be back and to 'keep him mind' if I'm lonely.
Her post went viral with thousands (yes, thousands) of women sharing empathetic words of support. The post currently has 12,571 shares, 7.6K likes, and more than 1,000 comments.
Other women also revealed that they, too, try the engagement ring method to get men to back off.
Think the engagement ring method is ridiculous?
That's because it is -- just not as ridiculous as the fact that our culture emboldens men so much that they won't accept a woman's "no" unless it's accompanied by a man's attachment to her with the semblance of permanence that the engagement ring provides.
And it's not like women can always tell a guy off, even if she isn't at her workplace, like Guptill.
Women have been assaulted and killed for turning down men's advances.
As in, yes, murdered.
In September 2016, 22-year-old Tiarah Poyau was shot by a guy during the J'Ouvert Festival in Brooklyn, New York, after asking him to stop dancing on her in the street. The alleged shooter is facing up 25 years to life in prison, according to the New York Post. The alleged shooter told NY Daily News that the shooting was not "intentional," as he had been heavily drinking.
In January 2016, 29-year-old Janese Talton Jackson was followed outside of a local bar in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and then shot, after repeatedly turning down the advances of a man named Charles McKinney, who has been charged with murder, according to CBS News.
In October 2014, 27-year-old Mary Spears was shot and killed in Detroit, Michigan, after not giving a man named Mark Dorch her phone number in a night club, according to Fox 2 News. Dorch was sentenced to 30 to 60 years in June 2015.
These stories are just three of many that show how violent male entitlement can become. They prove exactly why Guptill and other women find it necessary to take extra and more passive measures to get men to leave them alone.
It's unacceptable and it's sad. A woman's "no" should not be followed by a man's multiple attempts to change her mind and certainly should not be responded to with violence.