Guy Friends: You Can't Live With Them And You Can't Live Without Them
Some say every girl should have at least one male friend. I am a strong believer in this, which is why the majority of my friends are guys.
They’re easier to be around, less dramatic and more entertaining. Instead of eating ice cream and listening to a girl wine about the jerk that doesn’t love her, you get to enjoy a few beers while laughing at your buddy’s crazy ex-girlfriend stories.
Adventures become more unpredictable and bets get more interesting. You get an insight on how a man’s mind really works. They offer advice that your girlfriends aren’t equipped to provide or are too scared to tell you.
As great as it sounds, however, does having this type of friendship prohibit potential romantic relationships from forming?
Be careful to remember that perception can be misleading. Say you go out for drinks with a couple of your guy friends. Everyone is laughing and having a good time, and at some point during the night, you make eye contact with a guy across the room and exchange flirtatious smiles.
No matter how good you look that night, though, he won’t approach you. The reason being, you’ve chosen to surround yourself with all guys.
Even though your boys are hitting on every girl who walks by, your eye-contact crush will still assume you’re either dating one of them or sleeping with all of them: classic male ignorance.
The same is true in reverse. When people see a guy and girl out by themselves, they automatically assume the two are dating. This has actually happened to me with one of my best friends.
We were at a local pub one night when he started flirting with the waitress. She was polite, but didn’t show much interest. It took me mentioning another guy for her to realize we weren’t together and she even made the comment, “Oh, I thought he was your boyfriend.”
After a good laugh and me explaining our friendship, her perception of him soon changed from questionable to intriguing. She became more playful and flirtatious.
Also, you can’t pick up a guy when you’re out with your guy friends. Since they’ve been there during your heartbreaks, it is only natural for them to be protective of you when it comes to other possible suitors; they tend to prevent progress with other guys.
You could be on the other side of the bar, chatting up a hottie when they spot you. Before you know it, one of them steps in, introduces himself, puts an arm around you and stakes some sort of unspoken claim.
Or even worse, you get dragged back to the group only to receive a lecture regarding your poor taste in men. Even though he probably knew what that guy was really after, you still deserved the chance to make the decision for yourself.
Upon getting cock-blocked by a guy friend, you're really just plotting your retaliation, which can turn into quite the viscous cycle. It’s probably best to just not “run game” when out with boys. Instead, sit back and enjoy the show they provide. Nothing is more entertaining than watching one of your cockiest guy friends get shot down.
Dealing with these types of situations on a regular basis can really be discouraging for your confidence level. However, have confidence in knowing that nothing is wrong with you; you’re just not making yourself open to opportunity in the right situations. This is one reason it’s important for a girl to have at least two, if not more, girlfriends.
Ultimately, you can’t walk around with a sign that reads “single” or “we’re not together” when you’re with your guy friends (I mean, you could, but that would be weird). Yes, they provide useful insight on the male species, but when it comes to certain things, nothing tops the reliability and comfort of another female.
So, just roll with it. Have fun with the boys, but remember to keep your girls on speed dial.
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