She Doesn't Need You: The Sexiest Thing A Woman Can Be Is Independent

by Dan Scotti

As brutally clichéd as it may sound, I truly believe all relationships are worthwhile.

I mean, even if your last relationship went up in flames, at the very least, you should now have a slightly better understanding of what you're looking for in another person – and that, in and of itself, is a positive.

By this point in time, after being in a fair number of relationships, I like to think I've at least gotten a better idea of the type of woman I'd like to spend the rest of my life with. Relationships force you to be aware of your own compatibilities.

When things don't work out with one person, it's important to understand why they didn't – and to avoid repeating the same mistakes (with someone different) down the road.

At the same time, it's equally important to gain an understanding of the type of person you are looking for, based on what does work. 

For me, I always look out for independence in women. In my opinion, there is nothing sexier.. Knowing that a woman wants you – but doesn't need you – won't allow you to become complacent within your relationship.

And if there's anything else I've learned from past relationships, it's that complacency leads to their demise.

Here's why the most attractive thing a woman can be is independent:

She speak ups for herself.

Expression is attractive – and when a woman is able to articulate herself in a supreme manner that demands the attention of every person in the room – it’s irresistible.

Independent women don’t need anyone else to speak for them; they’re confident with their own voices and aren’t shy about letting themselves be heard.

Relationships aren’t about spending all of your time with someone who constantly agrees with you; they’re about finding someone who makes you a better person – even if that means disagreeing with them from time to time.

A woman who speaks up for herself will force you to open your eyes to new perspectives.

She doesn’t need fake relationships.

Independent women will keep a tight circle. It's important to understand the significance of relationships, and these types of women know that a few good friends will always outweigh a large group of fake people you simply keep up appearances with.

When a woman doesn’t feel pressured to have a large group of people behind her, it demonstrates a sense of comfort in her own shoes, and that's an appealing quality.

Insecure people try to blend into a crowd; independent women have no problem standing alone, from time to time.

She knows her worth.

Independent women don’t need anyone to remind them of their own value. Since she's used to doing things for herself, a truly independent woman will understand the true extent of her own abilities – and also be aware of what exactly it takes to make (and keep) her happy.

As a result, independent women will rarely put themselves in positions where they can be taken advantage of.

This is an attractive quality in someone you’re looking to settle down with because, odds are, if she values herself – she’ll also value your relationship. 

She doesn't need anyone to help her get what she wants.

Independent women don’t wait for men, or anyone for that matter, to get them the things they want.

Sure, it's nice to be able to provide for your woman, but it’s also nice to know she's perfectly fine handling herself, too.

Independent women won’t get caught up on the specific things you can provide for them, but, rather, how you can make them better.

When independent women want something, they have no problems treating themselves to it.

She has her own set of values.

Self-reliant people are strong-minded freethinkers. Independent people trust their own instincts, and an independent woman will rarely look for reassurance when it comes time to make a decision.

At the same time, maturity requires an understanding and respect for other people's values, too, especially when they diverge from your own.

There’s a sense of security knowing that you’ve paired yourself with someone who thinks for herself, regardless of what the “popular opinion” might be.

When a woman is able to stand firm on her own morals, it shows a confidence in her own perspective.

She isn’t easily influenced by others.

Independent women rarely will trip over what “the scene” is up to on any given night.

Independent women focus on themselves, as opposed to what the masses are doing, which produces a realness you won’t find in other people.

When looking for a woman for the long run, you’re going to want to find a leader rather than a follower. When people are easily influenced by others, it usually leads to regrettable decision making.

Not to mention, it’s difficult to trust someone who sways with whatever direction the wind is blowing.