7 Things Every Girl Secretly Hates About Her Bittersweet Single Life


Being single is the definition of bittersweet. While girls who are in relationships may be nostalgic about the days when they were blissfully unattached, girls who are blissfully unattached tend to just want relationships.

At its best, the single life is a stream of exciting, open-ended questions: What am I doing tonight? Who will I dance with? Where will I end up afterward?

At worst, it's a dead-end road of confusion and frustration: Why doesn't he like me? Why am I still single? What's wrong with me?

When you find your relationship status so unattached that your single-girl flag is literally flapping in the wind, any reminder of the fact can leave you with a bitter taste in your mouth.

Many things can catch you off guard when you're single; check out the daily struggles that can really grind a single gal's nerves:

The age-old question: "Why are you still single?"

Whether you're at a family gathering or simply out to lunch with your coupled (and sometimes just overtly rude un-coupled) friends, as soon as someone mentions this question, otherwise good days will likely go up in flames.

"Well, I've been told I'm too critical and have commitment problems, so basically, my only choice at this point is to date my psychiatrist because he's the only one who understands me. Well, him and my dad, of course. Oops, do you think that sounds like I have daddy issues?"

Or is the best way to handle this humbly by answering with a chuckle and something like, "Oh, Shannon, you're too funny! Let me know when you figure it out."

If we had any clue as to how to change our singular status, believe me, we'd change it. In the meantime, it would be nice if everyone could stop asking the same question we are constantly asking ourselves.

The second-oldest question: "Table for one?"

In the case that I am indeed dining solo, I don't need some stuck-up hostess to flash her engagement ring in my face and look down at me from her pedestal of hostess-dom and ask through her clenched porcelain veneers if I will be eating my sandwich alone. We're at Applebee's, after all. Calm down.

But, when I'm actually meeting friends and have the misfortune of showing up first to reserve the table, I take personal offense to this question.

I have other people coming who want to spend time with me. Don't just assume that just because I am here without a man there are no other living beings on this earth who care to ingest food across the table from me.

When the guy you're flirting with drops the girlfriend bomb.

There's nothing more terrifying and humiliating than having the rug pulled out from under you and when it comes to flirting with random men in an effort to make a love connection, this rug-pulling often comes in the form of the word "girlfriend."

As in, "Oh, my girlfriend loves that restaurant!" or "My girlfriend and I just bought a new couch last week that would match your skirt almost exactly..."

Well. You don't even deserve to look at my skirt. Not after that massive betrayal of my wide-open-to-love heart. Please excuse me while I proceed to hit on the bartender because I will not be leaving this club without having tried every option first.

Realizing that all the good ones are gay or taken.

After you've taken the time to tally up the number of guys you failed at asking out because either they had a girlfriend or they had a boyfriend, you're feeling extra bad about yourself. Apparently, your gaydar has grown rusty.

Asking someone on a date.

Or, waiting to be asked on a date.

Either way, a date is your only ticket off of the Single Lady Express and while it's an exciting idea in theory, a date can be tough to come by.

While the thought of asking a guy on a date may bring about nausea, having to wait for a guy to ask you out brings on that nausea double fold.

Not to mention, it can get tiresome to always be on the lookout for your potential soul mate. Once you find yourself genuinely considering the possibility that the homeless man sitting a table away at Dunkin' Donuts could be the father of your children, you should start to question your judgment.

Actually going on a date.

Most people would consider this to be a small victory, but for the single girl actually going on the date, it could be the most annoying/horrifying reality of being single and ready to mingle.

For one, it means you've somehow convinced someone that you look this fantastic all of the time. Good luck keeping up that charade if things continue going well.

Going on a date means you'll have to spend the next few hours on this romantic equivalent of a job interview small talking. It's your job to ensure that he is neither a serial killer nor a homeless man who spends all of his free time at Dunkin' Donuts.

Watching couples do anything.

Really, what could be a worse reminder that you're single than a happy couple simply existing within a 100-foot-radius?

With everyone pairing off like he or she is preparing for the next great flood, it's tricky to be a single girl. Girls between relationships will always have struggles and couples will continue to make them feel awful.