35 Reasons Why I Am Actually Crazy, But You're Still A D*ck

by Ashley Fern

As much as women like to say they aren't crazy, there are certain situations that bring out some less-than-desirable traits in us.

This isn't to say we are actually crazy, just that we express emotions in ways men sometimes can't wrap their heads around. Why? Because, men -- that's why.

Call me crazy, but you haven't called me in five days and I thought we were dating... Call me crazy, but you're actually the crazy one.

It's a hell of a lot easier to write off a woman's feelings by labeling her crazy than it is to deal with the situation at hand. We get the bad rap for a variety of reasons, and today it's time to own it and lay it out.

I asked a handful of women about times when they've been called crazy, and this is what I've gathered. I'm guessing all women can relate because -- whether we want to admit it or not -- we are all in this together.

1. I might have looked at your phone, but you were being shady and texting other girls.

2. I might be jealous, but you have Tinder downloaded on your phone.

3. I might be snooping, but you were messaging your ex.

4. I might be a stalker, but your feed is filled with pictures of other girls.

5. I might be paranoid, but you used to f*ck my best friend.

6. I might be anxious, but you're the one who smoked all my weed.

7. I might be caught up in the past, but you resent me for mine all the time.

8. I might be oversensitive, but this is the second birthday you've forgotten.

9. I might be a b*tch, but you've also cheated on me.

10. I might be guarded, but you call me crazy.

11. I might be selfish, but you're the one who never makes time.

12. I might be defensive, but you nitpick everything.

13. I might ask too many questions, but you never give any details.

14. I might take two hours to get ready, but you criticize me to no end.

15. I might have called you five times, but you're an hour late for dinner.

16. I might be in a bitchy mood, but you never ask me about my day.

17. I might be "fine," but you don't even notice.

18. I might be holding a grudge, but you're the one who keeps making mistakes.

19. I might be clingy, but you flirt with everyone who walks by.

20. I might be neurotic, but you jacked my entire Xanax prescription.

21. I might be obsessive, but you have compulsively cheated on me.

22. I might have baggage, but you never take me on vacation.

23. I might have high standards, but you never try to impress me.

24. I might be skeptical, but your best friend is a hot girl.

25. I might be a nymphomaniac, but you'd rather watch football than get on top.

26. I might monopolize your time, but you don't pay for sh*t.

27. I might be dramatic, but you're always trying to play me.

28. I might love to drink, but you're the one who's puking at the end of the night.

29. I might hate your friends, but they're always talking sh*t.

30. I might be materialistic, but after three years, I expect more than a movie date.

31. I might be wound up, but you booked a vacation with your friends instead of me.

32. I might be neglectful, but you never want to do anything with my friends.

33. I might be arrogant, but you're just pissed I got promoted when you got laid off.

34. I might be moody, but you never seem to know how I'm feeling.

35. I might cry all the time, but at least one of us is getting me wet.