Through personal experience, stories from girlfriends and many romantic comedies, I’ve become a bit of a relationship connoisseur. I’m no love guru, but I find the rules of attraction fascinating.
Through my “research,” I’ve found that Gen-Y men can be easily sorted into three simple categories.
“Mr. Eager Beaver”
Ladies, we’ve all met this guy — the one who will essentially tell you his life story within the first few days. He’ll text you every morning, noon and night; he’ll plan dates way in advance; he’ll become so instantly involved in your life to an extent that will leave you sure that he’s in it for the long haul — you find it adorable how much he likes you.
The problem: Usually men like this mask their deep-rooted issues with over-attentiveness. You will likely exhaust every topic of conversation quickly with this guy, leaving you with nothing left to discuss. When his true colors emerge, you’ll feel blindsided. Eventually, the girl will start to feel suffocated and end communication, or his issues will dramatically end the relationship. Hey, if it's too good to be true, it probably is.
The solution: Everyone has heard of the “honeymoon phase” of a relationship, but truthfully, relationships shouldn’t have phases. Ease off the gas pedal; meeting someone new should be exciting, and unnecessarily rushing things along could be your relationship’s fatal downfall. Guys, allow some room for mystery, and ladies, don’t get so caught up in your romantic heaven that you miss the red flags.
“Mr. Baby Steps”
This is the guy who texts you one-word responses or just a single emoji and tries to make same-day plans with you. Maybe you’ve tried to get him to open up, but his responses are usually timid. You’re frustrated because you don’t know when you’ll hear from him, which makes you feel unsure of yourself — no one has time for this.
The problem: Ladies get frustrated and end things while the guy is left dumbfounded and confused. Guys who may be indecisive or insecure may need a forthright woman to vocalize her needs. But, if a guy can't be confident enough to stake his claim early, he’s likely not to change. Stop thinking he "just needs time” or “I need to be more patient." Unfortunately, this relationship was probably doomed before it started.
Solution: Communication, communication, communication. If a guy is legitimately interested in a girl, he needs to make her aware. A couple should always be on the same page in a relationship — no confusion or doubts, just clarity from the get-go. Things that are worth doing are worth doing correctly.
“Mr. Happy Medium”
Too often, we over-analyze situations to an extent that can compromise a potential happy outcome. “Does she like me? Am I annoying her? Will he call me? Will I see him this weekend?” Sometimes our worries get the best of us when in actuality, happiness is a simple equation. Guys are simple creatures; they appreciate honesty, and while many may project a strong sense of confidence, plenty are insecure. And, women are really not as complicated or dramatic as they may come across. Show girls attention by sending a cute text, paying a compliment and plan a date in advance; it’s not rocket science.