The Good, The Bad And The Ugly Of Having A Long-Distance Best Friend

by Ashley Fern

If you're lucky enough to find someone you can call a best friend, you should never let her go.

It sounds a lot easier when that friend lives within a close proximity to you, but when one of you moves straight across the country, things aren't as simple as they once were.

There are no more "It's your turn to get the hungover breakfast sandwiches" and definitely no more "My boyfriend's driving me crazy, come hang out with me and let's get high" instances.

Instead your relationship is managed through poorly-timed Gchat conversations, constant text messages, drunken FaceTimes and inopportune phone calls. No one said it would be easy. No, definitely not, but it will be worth it.

You can't just let someone out of your life because you can't physically see her all of the time. How could you even justify that to yourself? Exactly. You couldn't.s

So what does life look like when your friendship is stretched across thousands of miles? Probably a little something like this...


The Good: You can't see how much she doesn't give a sh*t just by the look on her face.

The Bad: You never know when to STFU.

The Ugly: You keep complaining even when she doesn't respond, driving the both of you even crazier.

Making Travel Plans

The Good: You are both somewhat functional adults who can spend paychecks on flights to visit one another.

The Bad: You have completely disregarded any and all other social obligations.

The Ugly: After about three trips, you both realize you are completely broke and spent all of your savings on visiting each other.


The Good: She isn't there to bash that SOB's face in.

The Bad: She isn't there to bash that SOB's face in.

The Ugly: You have no one to indulge with during your Domino's, Pinkberry and every-single-brand-of-chips-you-can-get-your-hands-on feast.

Overall Communication

The Good: Technology is on your side here: FaceTime, Gchat, texting, Snapchat -- you name it, you've got it.

The Bad: You realize the only people you both speak to are each other.

The Ugly: It's 5 am her time and you just broke up with your boyfriend. You've sent 30 text messages, completely ignoring the time difference, which just wakes her up and makes her even less eager to respond.

The Actual Reunion

The Good: Distance does make the heart grow fonder! There's nothing more exciting than seeing your BFF after spending months apart; you both jump up and down whilst reliving your most hilarious inside jokes.

The Bad: Seeing her with her new crowd of friends just makes you sadder you don't live in the same time zone.

The Ugly: You both know you'd ditch your respective groups of friends just to be back in each other's arms.


The Good: Thank God for technology; you can still ask and receive advice on whether or not an outfit looks bad while trying it on.

The Bad: You aren't there when she disregards your advice and wears it anyway.

The Ugly: She and her frock are running around town, which only entices her to do something stupid. I guess that's what we like to call karma.


The Good: You're already dealing with your own hangover and can't imagine taking care of someone else.

The Bad: She's not there to tell you the horribly embarrassing things people/you did the night before.

The Ugly: You're getting Plan B all by your damn self.

Seeing Her Post Pictures With New Friends

The Good: She's still your best friend, so you're happy she's finally made new friends she's comfortable with.

The Bad: She barely texts you first anymore.

The Ugly: Her new best friend has the same birthday as you.

Going Out

The Good: You both are able to live separate lives while exploring new places.

The Bad: It's quite obvious you'd much rather be doing this while at each other's sides.

The Ugly: You both black out every night out of sheer and utter misery that your best friend is miles away and come home and eat an entire pizza while trying to FaceTime the other for hours on end until you pass out face down in the pizza box.

New Boyfriends

The Good: You say he's great, so your BFF must believe you.

The Bad: You obviously aren't going to be forthcoming about those terrible details you know would be deal breakers.

The Ugly: If you figure out he's a scumbag, your friend is clear across the country... so you'll be beating his ass all on your own.

Family Gatherings

The Good: Your family can see how depressed you are without your BFF and throws you some moolah for your vacation fund.

The Bad: You get unnecessarily drunk because you are so excited your family finally understands your pain.

The Ugly: By the end of the night, every single person is more than convinced you and your best friend are actually lesbians and this money is going into your wedding fund.

They are secretly happy your BFF has moved across the country because, in your family's eyes, you are certifiably insane.