The Best Vibrator For Your Zodiac Sign

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In a world full of vibrators big and small, finding the right one for you can be intimidating. Do you want something with many speeds? One that looks like a dick? One that looks like a lipstick? One you can wear?

There are so many questions to be answered. A vibrator is an investment. It is an expensive piece of equipment and possibly one of the most important purchases you will ever make. Orgasms are no joke, my friends. This shit is f*cking serious. Don't mess with your orgasms.

OK, anyway.

When it comes to finding the perfect vibrator for you, why not look to your zodiac sign? Every zodiac sign is different. It's the best indicator for your needs. Your sexual vibrations are literally written in the stars. The perfect vibrator for your very special needs is right this way.

Vibe on, my darlings.

Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)

Amazon

The Aquarius woman is strong and fiercely independent. She is also stoic and values both her privacy and control. The IPO 2 finger vibrator is just the thing for this dominant woman. It is small, discreet and very powerful. It is perfect to stash in a clutch before an adventurous night out, for the Aquarius woman is also full of mystery.

PicoBong IPO 2 Finger Vibrator, $42, Amazon

Pisces (February 19 - March 20)

Amazon

Although the Pisces is just about the nicest girl you will ever have the pleasure of meeting, she can also get shy easily. She's a doll, our Pisces girl, but when it comes to vibe world, she needs something unassuming and digestible. The Form II is perfect for our shy, emotional Pisces. It's small, looks like a bunny rabbit and comes in non-threatening pink.

JimmyJane Form 2 Vibrator, $60, Amazon

Aries (March 21 - April 19)

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The Vesper by Crave is for the sign that loves luxury. According to Lorrae Bradbury, founder of the sex positive site Slutty Girl Problems and an Aries girl, the Vesper “can be worn as a necklace and can be engraved (really gorgeous - perfect for a sign that likes luxury like me.”

Crave Vesper Vibrator Necklace, $69, Amazon

Taurus (April 20 - May 20)

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The Tiani 24k is perfect for the Taurus who always loves the finer things in life. This lavish sex toy is the perfect tool to help every sexual encounter be memorable in its novelty and sensuality.

LELO Tiani 24k Luxury Couples' Massager, $399, Amazon

Gemini (May 21 - June 20)

 

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For the diversity-loving Gemini, anything from The London collection by Je Jou is just the thing. Bradbury says that what makes this toy so cool is its customizable features. You buy a motor, choosing its strength on your preference, followed by interchangeable heads to also fit your preference (whether you like clit stimulator, cock ring, internal toys, etc.).

This fits the bill for the Gemini girl, who always wants to try new things.

JeJou London Collection, $54, Amazon

Cancer (June 21 - July 22)

Amazon

The Eva is for the intensely emotional and slightly vulnerable Cancer. The Cancer girl craves intimacy in her intimate encounters but can sometimes feel shy about being aggressive. Putting this couple's vibrator where it can work its magic, hands-free, allows the Cancer to get her own while never having to feel self-conscious.

Dame Products Eva Couples Vibrator, $99, Amazon

Leo (July 23 - August 22)

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Leo is a powerful, loyal sign, and they take everything in life very seriously, including their sex toys. For the Leo lady, I recommend the most powerful vibe of all: The Magic Wand.

The Original Magic Wand, $58, Amazon

Virgo (August 23 - September 22)

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The Gigi 2 vibe is perfect for the precise and reliable Virgo. It's a vibrator that will always do the trick when it's needed. Double vibration power gets the Virgo girl to her peak when she's on a time crunch, all while staying super quiet.

LELO Gigi 2 Vibrator, $138, Amazon

Libra (September 23 - October 22)

Babeland

The Libra lady is all about being in charge. For this woman on top, the only thing that will do is the Boss Lady. A bright red, realistically shaped vibrator will allow you to get the job done. Hit the booster button, and you'll feel an explosion of pleasure power. Saddle up!

Also Try: Big Boss Vibrator, $140, Babeland.

Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)

Amazon

Hello Touch X by Jimmy Jane is perfect for the passionate, pleasure-craving Scorpio. She is a woman who enjoys having complete power over her lover. Being able to strap on these vibrating, pulsing beads is the ultimate turn-on for this spicy sign.

Jimmy Jane Hello Touch X, $70, Amazon

Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)

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If there is one word that describes our beautiful Sagittarius woman, it is adventurous. For such an adventurous woman, only the most adventurous vibrator will do. I recommend the Lovehoney Dream Rabbit 10 in bright-ass purple. With a rotational head, beadwork and clit stimulator, this baby will take you to zero to orgasm before the first song on your sexy playlist ends.

Lovehoney Dream Rabbit, $45, Amazon

Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)

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The Womanizer is perfect for the dominant and willful Capricorn girl. It uses suction instead of vibration, which is perfect solo play for the fiercely independent woman.

Womanizer Pro, $175-200, Amazon