4 Reasons Living The Single Life Makes You More Cultured
It's hard to be single in a world filled with Facebook anniversary posts, bae selfies on Snapchat and coffee date pictures on Instagram.
I am the only single girl in my group of friends.
Sometimes, this is a great thing. And sometimes, this is not.
When you are what feels like the only single person in a sea of hip-joined couples, it starts to wear you down.
You could be a confident and even secure human being, yet slowly but surely, it will itch and scratch at your very existence.
At least for me it does.
Scrolling through news feeds and seeing endless appreciation posts, lovers' gifts, happy anniversaries or whatever it may be, is depressing.
It’s probably the equivalent to a slap in the face.
This is coming from someone who has clearly become insecure about it.
I’m sure there are plenty of people out there who wouldn’t bat an eyelid and are completely happy being single.
You go, people!
But when you aren’t happy with yourself and don’t love yourself, you will take everything to heart (anniversary posts and boyfriend chatter included).
For you, it’s a constant reminder everyone is happy and has someone that loves him or her.
It’s a constant reminder no one loves you. When it’s cold and rainy, you have no one to cuddle but a cold pillow (or potentially the cat, if he or she is in a cuddly mood).
It’s a constant reminder your friends are all getting their lives together and preparing for the future, while you’re still getting over hangovers at 2 pm on a Sunday afternoon.
And it’s not that your friends don’t love you or that their relationship talk and their success is out to get you.
Simply, you feel like the odd one out. You think people pity you because you haven’t yet managed to settle down.
You may not even want their pity, yet sometimes, it’s there. And even if you feel as though you don’t need to be pitied, it affects you.
Your friends are golden.
And regardless of whether they are with somebody or not, the good friends won’t care whether you have somebody or not.
But, that’s not the problem. The problem is you are different from them.
You are alone, and they don’t get it.
How could they?
They couldn’t put themselves in your shoes because they are so far from them. And that’s not their fault.
It’s because we live in a society where the end goal is to find someone you love and never let him or her go.
You get the constant questions, too.
Family members — grandparents especially — coworkers and people you meet on the dance floor ask if you have a significant other in your life.
It can come from anyone because it's a common thing to ask about.
“Are you seeing anyone?”
“Do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend?”
Why is that so important?
It goes alongside the “What are you studying?” and “What are you doing with your life?” questions.
Uttering “no” every single time isn’t exactly easy. But, it can be a marvelous thing.
I’m here to eradicate all the negativity that goes alongside, “No, I’m alone.”
I’m here to tell you whether or not you have found someone who isn’t a complete assh*le, it does not define who you are.
I’m here to tell you why you should learn to love being the only single girl:
1. You won’t rely on people for happiness.
There are so many times we rely on people in our lives to make us happy.
But sometimes, being single can teach you independence. It can teach you about who you are and how to be happy all on your own.
Your friends have somebody there constantly, but you have the freedom to explore the world, to set your own goals and to love yourself before you love somebody else.
2. Not to be clichéd, but you only live once.
Shag that hot guy from the bar. Go on lots of dates, and flaunt it while you can.
Because someday, whether you like it or not, the woman or man of your dreams is going to come along, and you may just miss your days of freedom.
You’ll look back on them with a smile on your face and no regrets.
Don’t waste time now worrying about the unknown future.
3. Your friends live vicariously through you.
When you stop worrying about being judged for all your messy hookups, you’ll find your true friends are extremely interested in your raunchy stories and dating extravaganzas.
They only have one person to talk about, so they’re keen to lap up all the gossip you have to offer.
Bask in the glory of it.
4. Every person you meet is special.
Instead of just having one person to share things with, you will have many.
Every person and every moment is unique.
You will realize you can share experiences, have deep and meaningful conversations and have laughs with a variety of different people who are each special in their own way.
And then when people ask you if you’re with someone, you can say, “No, but I’m happy.”
And really mean it.