The Stubble Is Real: 6 Reasons Why A Woman's Worst Enemy Is Her Razor

by Ashley Fern

Shaving is the worst thing a woman can do to herself.

No, seriously, it is.

Every woman knows (or at least rationalizes) that it makes absolutely no sense unless it's the summer or you're getting laid.

If you really think about it, no one else is touching or seeing your legs at any other time besides yourself. And, let's be honest, we don't really give a sh*t about the last time we shaved.

I blame men for the pressure to do this because, honestly, women understand how annoying this process is and if it were up to us, we'd be rocking our high-waisted shorts with leg hair long enough you could braid.

Not really... because that's disgusting, but you get the point.

We can't outwardly express our annoyances with this because we just sound like bratty women and life is just oh so hard for us. But I don't really give a sh*t about annoying anyone right now because I'm fed the F up.

Here's exactly why:

1. The hair grows back by the end of the day

Men aren't the only ones sporting 5 o'clock shadows; we women have not one, but two of them -- and they take up more than 50 percent of our bodies.

Yes, we could wax them, but let's be serious, we'd much rather spend $50 on a new top than on personal grooming. That sh*t is as expensive as it is painful and most definitely not worth looking into.

And for those preaching laser hair removal, I have but only one thing to say to you: What do you do for a living? Because I can barely afford groceries on my salary let alone an unnecessary cosmetic procedure.

2. Missing a spot is the most defeating feeling you could ever experience

The feeling of missing a spot after shaving is equivalent to sleeping with a guy who never calls you again.

Yes, it's to that extreme; we feel that right down to our very core. If you miss a spot, it's essentially the same as not shaving at all because all anyone is going to notice is that one small patch of hair.

You already dried yourself off and have reached the point of no return, so hopping back in the shower is not an option. Obviously, you do what any normal girl would do: try to dry shave it outside of the shower. Which brings us to...

3. Razor burn is all too real

There's nothing like thinking you achieved the perfect shaving session only to become all too aware of red dots 15 minutes after departing from the shower.

Mother F-er, now you have to completely change your outfit and put on pants because ain't nobody want to be looking at that throughout the night.

The worst part is just because you cover it up doesn't mean it's gone. You now have denim material rubbing against your thighs making it even worse.

4. Cuts, every f*cking time

Is this what death feels like because I actually swear I'm losing pints of blood as we speak. The worst part about cutting yourself while shaving is that it doesn't matter how minuscule the incision is, your bathroom still resembles a murder scene.

The type of agony these cuts cast upon you puts paper cuts between your fingers to utter and complete shame.

You can't even put a bandaid on at that moment since your skin is still moist, forcing you to channel your inner dude and put a small piece of toilet paper on the cut.

Enjoy ripping that off because it feels just as terrible as the cut itself.

5. It takes up your sweet and precious time

If it's a shaving day and a hair-washing day, you can guarantee you will be hanging out in the shower for a solid 15-20 minutes.

The only way to justify the time shaving takes is to rationalize that it allows your conditioner to settle into your hair.

How do you make this an enjoyable experience rather than a dreaded encounter? Music. Trust me, this will change your life. I used to be the girl who hated showering, now I can't wait for it. Just kidding, I still hate showering.

6. You have to make a schedule around your sex life

Shaving = planning. It gets pretty frustrating determining the ideal day to shave since the next day the stubble rears its ugly head and you are left with yet another dilemma.

Got a date mid-week? Traveling for the weekend? You bet your ass you are waking up at the crack of dawn to eliminate said problem.

Photo Courtesy: We Heart It