Keeping a relationship together can often feel like an entire occupation in and of itself. It takes work, even in areas that you didn't realize needed work, like going to sleep. And sometimes, it can feel daunting to figure out how happy couples sleep well, especially when stress runs high for both you and partner.
When you're in a relationship, going to sleep isn't always as simple shutting your eyes and snapping into the process of your sleep cycle. Sometimes -- in fact, most times -- compromise will be the necessary ingredient to your success. And, let me tell you, that applies to so much more than simply finding a comfortable bedtime routine with your babe. But that's another conversation for another day.
When it comes to going to sleep with your SO, you may often forget that an arrangement of compromises may, and most likely will, have to happen in order to make sure that both you and your significant other are content. According to Psychology Today, going to sleep at the same time as your partner is one of the easiest ways to ensure a more content and happy relationship. So simple, yet so effective.
Elite Daily spoke to a few experts on the matter to figure out some surefire ways to find relationship contentment once it's time for the both of you to lay your heads down to sleep. Here are a few pieces of advice they had to share.
1. Use The Bedroom As An Intimate-Only Space
According to Dr.Kimber Shelton, licensed psychologist, relationship expert, and owner of KLS Counseling & Consulting Services in Dallas, Texas, the bedroom should be used for intimacy, connection, sleep, and nothing more:
Use the bed as a way to connect and be intimately close to your partner before going to bed. Habits such as using the phone or computer, doing work in bed, and watching TV in the bed can distract from emotional and physical intimacy. Avoiding use of devices in the bed can give the couple more time for talking, working through issues, cuddling, and falling asleep together.
2. Work Out Sleeping Logistics
Dr. Shelton also advises that you work out the kinks and be prepared to budge on things that aren't absolutely necessary for you.
In terms of finding that happy medium with your partner, she tells Elite Daily,
You like to be warm; your partner likes to be cool. You like the fan on; your partner likes no noise. You like the door open; they prefer the door closed. Figure out a way that each of you can be comfortable in bed. Consider if sleeping desires are preferences, or if they are musts. If you prefer quiet, but can sleep with the fan on, you can avoid unnecessary arguments by respecting your partner's needs and musts.
Plus, Dr. Shelton explains, you and your SO may feel closer to one another simply by respecting one another's sleeping needs.
3. Have Sex
This one should be relatively easy right?
However, you might be surprised to learn how many couples become too busy for sexual intimacy.
Dr. Shelton advises that sex is an excellent way to relax right before you and your beau drift off to sleep:
Besides being physically enjoyable, during sex and orgasm, the body releases hormones that improve mood and calm the body -- a recipe for sleeping well together.
4. Focus On The Positive
According to April Masini, relationship and etiquette expert of AskApril.com, gratitude with your babe will go a very long way when it comes to a fulfilling night of sleep.
She tells Elite Daily,
Before you go to sleep, make a mental note -- or a conversational one -- about what went well during the day. Acknowledge what you're thankful for and how good you feel about it, whether it was an amazing dinner, a meaningful conversation, great sex, a visit with someone you adore, or just a beautiful day. Whatever it is, imprint yourself with a good feeling before bed. It's the bad feelings and anxieties that wake you and prevent good sleep. So state what's going right in your life and the world.
5. When All Else Fails, At Least Have A Good Mattress
A good mattress is one of those adult investment pieces that you absolutely should not skimp on, especially if you're in a relationship. Not only do you need sleep to function individually, but your relationship needs restful sleep to really thrive. Trust me, no one is on their best behavior without a good night's rest.
Parinaz Samimi, a sleep and wellness expert with Sleeptrain.com, tells Elite Daily,
Make sure you have the right mattress -- by that I mean finding a mattress that has layers of memory foam that not only provide a cooler sleeping experience, but also make your SO's movements undetectable. It also might be time to ditch the queen-size mattress, and invest in a larger king-size one that gives both people the freedom to move comfortably and have their space while sleeping.
Sweet dreams, lovebirds.