Honestly, if your gynecologist sounds anything like that auntie (or uncle) who always looks at you with a side-eye, it's time for her (or him) to go.
Your gynecologist is your doctor -- not your mother, not your father, and not your shady auntie in the corner sipping her tea.
Your gyno should provide you with a safe space, and if that's not the case, then you should probably think about prioritizing your emotional needs just as much as your physical needs during that visit.
Here are five ways to know when it's time to move on from your gynecologist.
1. If You're Not Feeling The Energy
It's all in the energy, babe.
Something doesn't always have to be tangible for you to feel it.
Trust your gut. If you feel like you are being spoken to with a judgmental, condescending tone, believe what you feel.
If you feel like you're being interrogated in an unkind way, don't ignore it. Energy is real AF, and it's easy to forget that.
2. If They Seem Impatient
Listen, you are there to ask questions, to have your concerns addressed, and to completely understand the full extent of what your body can offer, and what it is currently doing.
If you find you can't ask questions without your gyno becoming annoyed with you, then that should be a huge red flag.
Out of all times and places to ask questions, your gynecologist's office is the perfect time and place.
He or she should never cut you off, and they should never rush you. Every little thing should be done with extra care and consideration.
3. If Your OBGYN Doesn't Explain Things Well
You are not there in the doctor's office to solely be silently examined like a scientific specimen in the lab.
You are there to understand your anatomy. Why do I secrete this way? Why do I feel like this when I walk? Your gyno should be communicative throughout the entire visit.
If you leave this sacred space more confused than when you walked in, then your doc was simply not doing their job correctly.
Time to move on, girl.
4. If They Seem Disheveled
Your OBGYN is a professional. Or, at least, they're supposed to be.
As a doctor, your gynecologist should not appear disheveled in any sense of the word when a patient is with them.
You want to feel like you are the only concern on your doctor's mind when the two of you are in that exam room. This is your selfish time, your time to be taken care of.
There is no reason at all why you should feel like a last priority because your doctor couldn't get their sh*t together before entering the room.
5. If Your Gynecologist Is Unaffordable
You should be able to afford your health care, plain and simple.
Be sure to look for someone in your network. To do that, go to your insurance's website and search around the page.
If you're confused, call your insurance company, and an agent will be happy to help you to find the best provider in your network. It doesn't have to be a gruesome experience.
And, even if you don't have insurance, your local Planned Parenthood can still help you with regular, low-cost check-ups.
Finding the right gynecologist can be a difficult task. You might have to search around, read reviews, feel it out—it's annoying, quite frankly, and requires patience.
ZocDoc is a great place to start for reviews on what OBGYN is best for you.
Above all, though, remember to take your time. This is one of those processes that requires your attention.
Your vagina deserves the royal treatment, and nothing less.