The NFL season is upon us, and boy, does it mark a glorious time in our lives.
But along with your fantasy points and actual team wins comes dealing with the most annoying sports fans known to man. These fans are a necessary evil to the game we love so much.
Here are eight of the most annoying fans you'll find at an NFL game (so don't be this person):
1. The self-appointed section cheerleader.
You know the kind: the ones a few rows in front of you, who are more interested in turning around and demanding you stand up and cheer on every single play, instead of watching the actual game.
No matter how big of a fan you are, it isn't really necessary to lose your voice from cheering every 30 seconds.
2. The guy who says girls don't know sports.
Every real sports fan equipped with ovaries has fallen victim to this inaccurate assumption. And guess what? It's old.
According to a recent study, 76 percent of females classify themselves as NFL fans, not to mention 46 percent of NFL merchandise is purchased by my fellow female fan base.
To be clear, it doesn't matter how or why any of us girls became fans in the first place. We just are. And yes, it's likely I know more about your favorite team than you do.
3. The super drunk people.
These are the people that make you wonder why they spent so much money on tickets not to remember a damn thing.
Going to an NFL game doesn't come cheap. The cheapest trip in the NFL is a trip to EverBank Field in Jacksonville, Florida, with an average “outing” cost of $141.60, including a game ticket, only one beer, one soft drink, a hotdog and parking.
During a week one game, I had the distinct pleasure of sitting next to a 50-year-old woman who only woke up once during the entire game to throw up on herself during the second quarter.
4. The irrelevant fan.
You might be the biggest Kobe Bryant fan known to man, but wearing a purple and gold jersey to a Houston Texans game also makes you the biggest douche of a fan known to man. Just don't do it.
5. People on their phone the entire game.
I get it. NFL games are exciting, and I, too, buy into the “pics or it didn't happen” mentality. But you paid big money to watch the game live — not through another screen.
If you're going to watch it through a mobile screen, instead of focusing on all the action happening right in front of your face, save the money and stream the game from the parking lot. Better yet, go watch it on your big screen at home, so you can pause it for bathroom breaks.
And let's be real: Out of all the 27 videos you took at the game, how many did you even watch, send or post? Probably not a single one.
6. Fans who think they are the entertainment.
I have quite a few friends who take their fandom (including, but not limited to, full-blown costumes that they travel with to away games, their own hashtags and logos and more) to incredulous levels.
Once the game starts, though, they are smart enough to realize the game is what's important – not their outfits, signs or face-painted alter egos.
Unless you are a paid mascot or player on the team, the day is not about you, Cinderella.
7. People who want a spot on the big screen.
Some of the best memes of our time come from people getting their debut on camera (in-stadium and broadcast coverage), not to mention full-fledged careers that began thanks to a Jumbotron appearance, like Pamela Anderson. (So yes, I guess there is a chance.)
I've known girls who get all dressed up, just in hopes of getting on the big screen. And they don't care about the game at all. To be honest, creating a YouTube channel and filming yourself grilling a steak in a Brazilian-cut bikini will likely yield more positive results than trying to stalk the cameras.
8. The heckler
There is a certain level of ribbing with the opposing team and their fans that makes a game interesting, but like most things in life, too much can be a bad thing.
There's no need to have a back-and-forth battle the entire game or to ever take things to a violent level. Speaking of fights, fighting with your own fans is the least classy thing you can do at a sporting event.
So let's be honest: Who's been one of these fans, or who's been to a game with one of them?