Twitter Account Gives "Better" Names To Everyday Objects And It's Hysterical

Eleonora Grasso

Up until now, the king of making up odd names for everyday items was Aziz Ansari's character in Parks and Recreation, Tom Haverford... but it looks like he has some competition.

You may recall Harverford changing jumbo shrimp to Biggie Smalls, pork rinds to Busta Rinds, and lemonade to LL Cool Ade.

Great work Harverford, but you have some stiff competition in 2017.

A Twitter account ironically named @CorrectNames is giving even better names to everyday objects and even animals.

Ever wonder what the correct name for a group of squid is?

A squad, duh!

If you thought these were Cheerios, boy were you mistaken.

You can only eat your bagel seeds with...

Cereal sauce, duh.

No, this isn't the ocean. It's actually...

Earth sauce.

I bet you thought this was a box of Kleenex.

Wrong again!

You're not drinking water in that glass, you're actually drinking...

Yup. Snowman blood.

Every organized structure has walls, your sandwich is no different.

Can someone please milk the horse?

Aww, this one is just plain wrong.

Not a-MOO-sing at all. LOL.

There were a lot of "Skyentists" in Armageddon.

Bartender, a glass of giggle sauce on the rocks, please.

I'm driving my land plane so I won't miss my sky car.

Kidding, I'm actually taking my land boat.

It's hot out, can you turn on the windy spin?

Nothing more beautiful than seeing this creature in it's natural habitat.

Again, this one's pretty mean.

The only bottoms perfect for the winter months.

Always use protection when wearing someone else's shoes.

This dinosaur still roams the Earth today.

Knock on the house mouth, will you?

Make sure you don't hurt your hand ankle.

I've actually said hand ankle before.

How cute is this duck puppy?

Each name is hilarious! But honestly, how does one come up with so many new names?

The mastermind behind this account must be a rebranding genius. I mean, who thinks of calling a platypus a Duck Puppy? Or calling a sock Foot Condom? And calling a car a Land Boat?

Pure genius, ya'll. Pure genius.