What To Do If You’re Bad At Sexting, Because It Isn't For Everyone

A lot of people think sexting is part of either the dating process or being in an actual relationship. Many feel the pressure of maintaining this idea that you constantly have to keep someone sexually interested in you, and if you don't, they'll leave. Well, this is a pile of bullsh*t. The truth is there are other ways to keep the spark alive with another person. If you're wondering what to do if you’re bad at sexting, don't feel like you need to immediately up your sexting game to keep your partner around. This isn't a thing! And if your partner is making you feel like sexting is a requirement and pre-requisite to being with them, then you might want to reconsider your relationship, because they may not respect your boundaries as much as you deserve.

I know for me, personally, it felt weird to go there for the first time. I had thoughts running through my head wondering if I was doing it correctly. The texts I received in response seemed like assurance enough, but honestly, sexting was a useful thing for my ex and I to do when he was abroad in Italy for a semester, and I in France. So here's what to do if you don't want to sext, aren't good at it, or want to try some other ways to keep things ~spicy~.

Send photos, instead.

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If you aren't exactly a wordsmith, but still want to sex up a texting conversation just a little bit, send a hot photo of yourself. And no, you don't need to send naked pictures if you don't want to — and don't let anyone pressure you into doing so. You could even send something as innocent as a picture of you on the beach. Your partner will appreciate it nonetheless, and you'll probably feel comfortable enough sending them something you'd post publicly as well.

Have a convo with your partner about why you feel like you're bad at it.

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Your discomfort with sexting could be due to lack of experience — it can definitely feel awkward at first. If you talk to your partner about what's making you feel weird about sexting, they may reassure you that they feel kind of awkward about it, too. This conversation might remind you that your partner just wants to have fun with you, and there aren't expectations to do anything to "make them stay." Also, they could end up telling you you're actually good at sexting, which could give you the confidence boost you need to get more into it.

Google it!

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With a quick and easy Google search, you can find plenty of content to assist you with your sexting needs. You can consult on all kinds of articles for guidance on this subject – including Elite Daily, of course. It's totally fine to check out what other writers suggest saying if you're unsure how to phrase things. Maybe it'll give you the little push you need to send that text you've been thinking of sending.

Don't do it.

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If you're "bad" at sexting because it brings you no enjoyment, makes you uncomfortable, or doesn't make you sexually connect more with your partner, that is A-OK. It just doesn't do it for you and there's absolutely no problem with that. Tell your partner that if you don't want to sext, you don't want to sext. You'll find something else that makes you both sexually excited to keep the energy alive when you're apart.

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