Relationships
Wedding night
10 Brides Reveal What Their Wedding Night Was *Actually* Like

by Candice Jalili
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As a non-married person, I am just dying to know: what are wedding nights really like? Listen, I know the wedding night is traditionally supposed to be the night a couple really physically celebrates their love. But, like, aren't they tired? Is everyone really just going to pound town after hours of cake and dancing and drinking? Well, luckily, I no longer have to wonder, thanks to a Reddit thread in which people shared what they really did on their wedding nights.

Throughout the Reddit thread, plenty of married people gave their totally unfiltered accounts of what they really did on their wedding nights and every single one of them is, in my opinion, perfect in its own way. Some of them really did make love. Some of them enjoyed some kinky role-playing. Some of them opted out of sex altogether and, instead, just played board games on their hotel bed. The point is these stories go to show there's no one way you should be spending your wedding night. Read along and find 10 totally different narratives of what a great wedding night can look like, because there's no one-size-fits-all answer.

They enjoyed a different kind of intimacy.
She sat on the floor in front of me. We watched TV while I took the 6,000 hairpins out of her hair. It was a horrible game of pick up sticks as they were all intertwined. After that we crashed.

/u/anvilmn

They had some pizza and some sex.
We had Chicago style pizza and f*cked in a hotel room.

/u/PM_BOOBIES_HERE

He puked, but it was still a "fantastic" night.
It was fantastic. We both drank way too much. Went back to the room, gave my wife D, threw up in the shower, ate some wedding cake then went to sleep. I'll never forget it.

/u/AreWhyAyeEhn

She had the flu, so her husband had to shut down the reception solo.
I had the flu, so I left the reception early and went to bed shivering violently and puking and sh*tting, while my very introverted husband was a gracious host to 40 people. We didn't have sex for a week.
Ten years later, marrying that dude is the best decision I've ever made. :)

/u/What_the_shit_Archer

They did some fun role play.
We were still drunk from reception, we stripped each other, showered together, and had sex on the bed, floor, the table and anything in our hotel room we could f*ck on. I woke up the next morning in handcuffs. She was the cop and I was the bandit.

/u/5ft11flip

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She blurted she wasn't wearing panties to her mom.
I had a huge dress on. We had been drinking for hours we ran into our room had a decent quicky, ran out into the hallway where I declared in a loud drunken whisper " I don't have panties on" while following our friends to an after after wedding party in another hotel room. Turns out my mom was behind me and howled with laughter, hugged me told me I was the perfect daughter, handed me a bottle of whiskey and sent me off with my husband to brew a wicked hangover.

/u/TheatreDame

They had to take a nap before getting physical.
We both had too much to drink, went to the hotel room and passed out until about 11 p.m.. Then got up and ate terrible Chinese food and finally tried fooling around which was terrible and we finally gave up.
Fortunately we'd been having great sex for the previous year so it wasn't any big deal, we laughed about it later and were married for 30 years. I feel for people who's first night together is their wedding night, after one of the most stressful days of their lives, probably drinking too much, etc., chances are it's not going to be great sex, doesn't mean it can't be great emotionally though.

/u/bvillebill

She went to work and he watched TV on the couch.
Eloped without telling anyone and got married in the basement of the courthouse in Harrison, AR. Went home, wife went to her overnight job while I laid on the couch and watched tv.

/u/randye

It was a "perfect" evening.
We had a noon wedding and lunch reception, so we got to our hotel around 5:00. We'd had sangria, but weren't drunk, and since we'd abstained for a month before the wedding, we were ready to go. Round one happened and we took a nap. Woke up around 8, ate some leftover food that our awesome caterers had packed up for us and someone had put in our car, watched some TV, had sex again, and fell asleep. Perfect and relaxing evening.

/u/kcbrush

They played board games in bed.
Enjoyable. We had our hotel room the day before the wedding. Got to the church, did our thing, had a blast at the reception. We leave the reception, my bride tells me her period started at the f*cking church. We walk around our favorite store and bought a new board game. We played Monopoly and watched TV on the most comfortable bed we had ever slept on.

/u/rebel_dogs

See how every one of these stories was perfect in its own way?