These Wild Real-Life Wedding Stories Will Literally Have You ROFL
At my brother's first wedding (he’s had three) my disapproving mother wept so loudly that the pastor had to stop the wedding for my brother to shush her. At my friend's wedding, her maid of honor had just broken up with one of the groomsmen. She arrived at the wedding drunk with a new guy who she proceeded to have sex with in the bride and groom's hotel room just to make her ex jealous (he wasn’t). Yeah I’ve seen some awkward wedding moments, but nothing that compares to a recent Reddit thread where women reveal their wildest wedding stories. Mine were pretty tame in comparison.
It's actually pretty incredible just how many ways a wedding can be ruined — or at least get really cringeworthy, really fast — when you think about how much time, money, and energy went into planning the perfect day. But then I guess that's what makes these kind of stories so fun to read, right? In the stories below, you'll find everything from horny guests, to bizarre music choices, and even an alligator wedding crasher. Fun! So, get ready to laugh and cringe at these weddings gone seriously awry.
Wedding Music Gone Wrong
[My] dad and stepmom had a wedding where the entire ceremony’s soundtrack were vocal songs that played during the first “Shrek” movie. Yes, even All Stars.
When I was in college, two of my friends got married. I couldn't drive at the time, so my dad took me. It was a small outdoor wedding. I told him he could join but he was like "nah it's nice out I'm just gonna go sit on that bench and chill with my guitar and this book of crossword puzzles." Eventually when I go to leave, I say goodbye to my friends and mention that I should get going because my dad's just been chilling in the park, playing guitar or whatever. Friend deadpans and says "wait, what does he look like?" Turns out, when my friends went to take pictures off in the park, they happened to pass near my dad. He says to himself "well gosh, here are two kids my daughter's age wearing wedding gear, bet they're her friends." So he starts following them around, providing them with some nice background music for their photoshoot. BUT HE DOESN'T TELL THEM WHO HE IS. So yeah my dad just creepily serenaded my friends which they enjoyed but come on man.
Guests Who RSVP’d No (Pants)
My idiot ex-friend served as minister for his friend’s (groom) wedding, and he got caught having sex with the groom’s boss in the parking lot after the reception. The boss’s husband and 7 year old child caught them.
At my own wedding I didn't have a best man but I've had a best woman. My best woman and I had gotten ready in her room ready for the big day, I had left my bag and such in the room as my future wife was getting ready in the marital suite. To cut a long story short, my best woman had come up to me drunk and said something about one of the couple I had invited, I giggled and had paid no attention. Later on, I realise I haven't seen her in about an hour and I think that she's probably asleep and it's about time I get my bag and put it into my room. I slowly open the door and walk in to discover my best woman in between another lady's legs and her hubby across the room just enjoying himself. Safe to say I calmly got my bag, said hello and waved and just walked out. I will never let her forget this.
One of my bridesmaids fainted in the middle of the ceremony.. Then after she stood up and we made sure she was okay, the pastor looked over to the groomsmen and said “Do any of you guys want to help her feel a bit less embarrassed?” Then one of them promptly pretended to faint. Definitely something I’ll never forget.
My [sister in law] objected! She quickly followed with a sheepish 'im sorry'
Whoa, Who Invited Them?
At my parents wedding, the best man gave a toast " To Todd and Mandy." My mother's name is Lucy.
My best friend's wedding was quite a spectacle because of "M". She was the party girl and was really only friends with the bride. She met up with another girl who she knew from the bachelorette party the day of the wedding and hung out with her on the beach before the 2pm wedding. While the other girl had about 2 beers, "M" was doing shots of vodka at 10am. During the ceremony she's shouting things like "Whoo Hoo! You go girl! Looking good!!!." There was only 50 guests total so she stood out. During the cocktail hour we were eating apps, got our drinks, and chatted while listening to soft music. Not "M". She was begging people to dance with her and proceeded to dance on the wall and at one point even slid down the wall like a stripper would a pole.
We all moved to the reception area where our dinner was served. While we're digging into our filet mignon's we notice that "M" is missing. Myself and another bridesmaid went out to find her and boy did we. The wedding venue was at a hotel and we got dressed in the MOB's hotel room. We found her in that room, in the bathroom laying down on the floor. Her undies were down, although no pee was in the toilet. One boob was out, no clue why. And she had a broken cigarette in her mouth, no lighter to be found. We woke her up and tried fixing her clothes. This is the kicker! She tells us that her friend is getting married today and she needs to get to her wedding. She didn't believe us when we told her that she is at the wedding, as we're standing there in our yellow and pink floor length matching dresses. We finally convinced her that she should go out and eat to sober up. On her way out she puked on the floor of the MOB's hotel room.
I'll be dammed if she didn't sit down and eat every single bite of her steak and then dance the rest of the night away without incident. That girl could rally.
When All Hell Breaks Loose
I went to the wedding of a cousin of my now-ex. It was held on the bride's parents' property. The bride and groom were young, about 19 or 20; and already had a 1-year old daughter. Ceremony is lovely, daughter is the flower girl, and their dog is ring bearer. It's all good until the booze gets flowing. Then the shit hits the fan. Bride comes running out of the house in her underwear about 18 sheet to the wind. She's screaming at the groom about how he ruined her life, she hates him; she regrets this marriage already. A drink is thrown. He's screaming back about how she's a whore, and a dumb b!tch. She screams "I should have called it off when I slept with [best man]!" And then the best man and his gf get into it. At that point ex and I grabbed some pizza (late night snack), his bother [sic] and got the hell outta of there. I heard a full blown brawl broke out after we left.
And This Is Why You Don’t Get Married In A Swamp
I went to a distant family member’s wedding when I was a young teen. The first mistake was that it was in a swamp.. in Florida.. in August. Muggy doesn’t even begin to describe it. There were so many mosquitos I’m surprised we all didn’t die of blood loss. The bride’s veil looked like fly paper because it was catching every bug within a mile radius. Now when I say this was in a swamp I mean that the altar was almost in the water. Halfway through the ceremony a gator showed up and we had to scooch everything back a few feet. By the time they announced the bride and groom we were all shiny with sweat, and red faced.
It comes time for the food, aaaaand the caterers are stuck in the mud somewhere. The DJ is in a similar predicament - so the groom and his groomsmen go off and show up a couple of hours later with a few cases of bud light and pizzas. They seal the magical evening by opening up the doors to the groom’s truck and blasting country for everyone to dance to. My parents had had just about enough so we left before the festivities got down and dirty. Being southern gives you wedding stories like this occasionally lol
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