The Amount Of Condoms Being Provided For The 2018 Olympics Literally Hurts My Head

by Cosmo Luce

Athletes, listen up: the number of condoms provided at the Pyeongchang Olympics in South Korea will be greater than the number provided at any other Winter Olympic Games in history. A whopping 110,000 condoms will be handed out to 2,925 different athletes. That is enough for every single athlete to have sex 37 times over the 16 days the games will be played, from February 9 to February 25. If that isn't breaking some record for endurance, I don't know what is.

Of course, the Olympic Village is notorious for raucous partying and the sex that follows the medal ceremonies. In London, there were stories about people having sex on the grass. In Rio, folks were worried that the amount of sex the athletes were having would enable the spread of the bloodborne Zika virus.

And while Olympic athletes having sex might sound jaw-droppingly scandalous given the amount of time and energy these very fit people have to devote to their particular sport, it's really not that surprising. Don't you remember what it was like during the giddy first days of freshman year or a week of sleep-away camp? Olympic athletes are young, ridiculously fit, extremely good-looking, and spent most of their waking life training under the watchful eye of parents and coaches. The Olympic games can be the culmination of years of hard work. It's only understandable that they would be looking for some physical release from all of that pressure.

Reporters and athletes' parents aren't allowed in the Olympic Village, and the adrenaline is running high after all of that competition. Plus, according to NPR, most Olympians have a ton of extra energy because they are maintaining their huge calorie intake but not training as hard as they usually do to prepare for the games. The Village also brings together people from all over the world who are as fit as superheroes. The temptation must be very, very real. Besides all that, who are we to judge how Olympic athletes choose to spend their time off the skating rink or luge track?

In any case, while there are more condoms this year than have ever been distributed at the Winter Games, athletes at the Summer Games are typically given even more condoms. In 2016, athletes received a total of 450,000 condoms over the course of the competition in Rio. Of course, more countries send more athletes for the more popular Summer Games, so there are fewer per person.

Organizers are making the condoms very accessible to both men and women, placing baskets full of contraceptives in the men's and women's restaurants not only in the two Olympic Villages in Pyeongchang and Gangneung, but also in the main press center, the Media Village, and the medical centers, according to organizers.

They do not anticipate that the athletes will use the condoms entirely, but they do want to prevent the spread of the HIV virus and other sexually transmitted infections that might hamper these athletes' careers.

Honestly, I'm all for this. I might not be able to get into curling, but I can definitely get into the thought of these Olympic athletes engaging in some celebratory sex. And while they are definitely deserving of their privacy, I think its perfectly natural for those who are watching along at home to indulge their curiosity about details such as the number of condoms being handed out in the Olympic Village. Because while all of us might not be athletes, sex is definitely something that the majority of us participate in. Like the Olympics, sex is something that everyone around the world can agree to love.

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