Life is all about expecting the unexpected. Car engines die, flus come on fast, grandmothers break their hips, and sometimes, life's many curveballs may require you to call off your plans. Of course, when someone cancels on you, it's not always easy to be sympathetic... especially if this isn't the first time it has happened. Deciding what lines to use if your date cancels last-minute totally depends on the situation, as well as the legitimacy of your date's excuse. And while there's nothing wrong with cutting that person some slack and offering to reschedule, you may also decide you're not willing to give that date another chance.
As Susan Winter, relationship expert and author of Breakup Triage: The Cure for Heartache, previously explained to Elite Daily, canceling on plans at the last minute could be a sign your date doesn't consider you a priority. "Some individuals don't take social commitments seriously, and this is a red flag," she said. And while that date may have a very legit, grandma-broke-her-hip-type excuse, Winter said, "There's only one reason for flaking on a date — you're not important to your date." Truth hurts, y'all. Depending on the situation, here's how to respond when you get that cancelation text.
If you don't want to make your date feel too guilty for canceling (and def want to give them another shot), then keep things light with one of these friendly texts, which will make your interest in rescheduling clear.
- Thanks for letting me know. Are you around next weekend instead?
- No worries! Things happen. Think you'll be free later this week? If not, we'll find another time.
- Ah, bummer. Send me a few dates that could work for you later this month and we'll reschedule.
- I understand. Rain check for sometime next week? I'd still really like to see you.
- Aww that sucks. I was looking forward to tonight. But good things come to those who wait 😉. LMK when you're down to try this again and we'll set a date.
If your date cancels without explanation, it's possible they're dealing with a personal matter. And while you probs don't want to pry, there are subtle ways to express concern (or slight annoyance) for an unexplained cancelation.
- Hope you're OK! I'm here if you need to talk.
- I'm sorry to hear you can't make it. Hopefully all is well and we can shoot for sometime next week instead.
- Uh oh. I hope nothing serious happened. Text me whenever you get things sorted out and we can talk about rescheduling.
- You better have a pretty good reason for canceling on me (but in all seriousness, I hope everything is all right!).
- Hmm. I'm just going to assume you have a good excuse 🤔. LMK when you're free and we'll give this another shot.
If you've got a repeat canceler on your hands, then you probably want to go with a firm response that makes it clear your time is not to be wasted.
- I'm sorry to hear you won't be able to make it tonight. I was really looking forward to getting together. I've got a lot going on these days, and this isn't the first time this has happened, so it would've been helpful if you'd reached out sooner.
- I understand things come up that you can't control, but this isn't the first time you've had to reschedule last-minute. Hopefully this is the last time this happens, because I'd really like to see you!
- Really? Again? You better hope this is the last time you have to cancel, or you may just miss your shot with me 😏.
- Don't forget: it's three strikes and you're out. Here's hoping you don't blow your last shot. I'll let you know when I'm free to try this again.
- This is the second time I've blocked off valuable time in my schedule only for you to cancel at the last minute. I wish you had more respect for my time. That said, I'm open to giving this another shot if you are.
If you get the sense your date simply doesn't respect your time, then it may be time to cut them loose with one of these straightforward messages.
- I understand these things happen, but I've just got too much going on right now to have plans canceled last-minute. I'm sorry we couldn't make this work.
- I'm sure you have a legit reason for canceling, but that doesn't excuse the fact that you've wasted my time. I wish you well.
- Welp, I guess I did my makeup for nothing. Thanks for that.
- A little late to let me know, don't you think? Pro tip: Don't do this to any of your future dates, because they'll likely lose interest in you as quickly as I just did.
- I'm sorry you can't make it tonight, and I'm sorry to say I don't think I'm interested in rescheduling. Hopefully you have more respect for your dates in the future.
Whether you decide to reschedule or not, remember that your time is valuable, and you deserve a person who sees that.
Source:
Susan Winter, relationship expert and author of Breakup Triage: The Cure for Heartache
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