How To Turn A Hookup Into A Relationship, As Told By 10 People Who Have Done It

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My boyfriend and I didn't necessarily hook up the first time we met but we were definitely hooking up for a long time before we decided that we were officially dating. In fact, I'd say there was about three months of ambiguous undefined "Wtf is this" territory before we even discussed becoming exclusive. And I don't think our story is unique either. In this day and age, lots of relationships start off as hookups. Wondering how it's done? A recent Reddit AskWomen thread asked ladies for tips on how to turn a hookup into a relationship based on their own experiences and, boy oh boy, DID THEY DELIVER.

Hooking up can lead to friendship which can lead to looooove.

My husband. We ended up best friends and fell in love.

/u/Leelluu

Spending time together is a breeding ground for feelings.

We weren't looking for a one night stand, more like a "I like to f*ck you, but I like to watch movies with you too".
Two years later and my Netflix & Chill turned accidental boyfriend is the love of my life.
How we got here was just spending time together. In the beginning, we went away for weekends (when I didn't have the kids). For sex, but we did just as much non-sexy time stuff. Talking for the two or three hours we we're in the car. Out to dinner while we were away. Walking along the beach. Etc, etc.
Until one day I looked at him and realized I was feelings thing I had wholeheartedly had meant to avoid feeling. And I liked it.
It turns out I quite liked getting to know him outside of any expectation of a relationship. I wasn't evaluating how he fit into what I thought I wanted in a partner. I was just getting to know him.

/u/i_have_no_ideas

You keep seeing each other then BOOM you're in a relationship.

Yes. I thought it was going to be a one nights as I was 24 and he was 19. I liked him but had decided it could never go anywhere due to the age gap. We kinda just...kept seeing each other after?? And stayed together ever since. We never made anything official in term of establishing the relationship, like he never asked me to be his gf, but we’re married now so I think it’s safe to say it’s serious.

/u/hesback_inpogform

Sometimes an ultimatum is a push in the right in direction.

I'm a guy, but my wife was the other person, so I'll answer.
We booked up in a club. Then I saw her at another club, hooked up again. Then, we started deliberately going to clubs with the intent to hook up with one another.
We didn't even speak of a relationship, or want to go for a date, we were at a stage where we wanted to just have fun, and we were very attracted to each other.
A few months of this, and we started talking to one another more regularly. On her birthday (in a club), a little under a year after our first hook up she told me that "we can't keep on doing this, it either has to go somewhere, or we need to stop." I thought about it all of five seconds, and it was only that long because I was drunk as f*ck. We went on a date the following week, then we a few more, made it official about a month later, have been with her for over 9 years and got married last fall.

/u/PopusiMiKuracBre

Hookups can turn into marriage too!

Yep! Tinder hook up turned husband. Neither of us were looking for anything serious. We matched and chatted for a day before going on a date. I like to joke that he showed up for our date and never left, but that is pretty much how it happened. Six months later we were engaged and at eighteen months we tied the knot. Honestly in evolved very naturally.

/u/SirRamsey

It was just a natural progression towards a happy, healthy relationship.

My SO and I started out as coworkers, then friends, then best friends, the FWB for about 6 months. Eventually, naturally became exclusive. A very healthy, happy relationship.

/u/Ray_adverb12

There's a chance the person you've been seeing already assumed you were exclusive.

Worked with a guy who I thought was cute. I'm 29 and he's 20 so I only wanted a FWB thing with him. He was clueless so I did all the work to get us to be FWB. For about 2 weeks or so we hooked up pretty regularly. The one night he suggests we go out for dinner. I was very surprised and not really into it but went anyway.
I eventually began to realize that it's emotionally impossible for me to hook up with a guy while sober and the reason I wanted to have sex with him was because I was into him. Some girl, 2 years younger than him, had a crush on him and it made me ask him if we should be exclusive and fully date now. He said he thought that's what we've been doing all along.
So now I'm dating a 20 year old and have absolutely no idea what I'm doing.

/u/singlemomwhowrks2hrd

Lots of relationships start as hookups.

Most of my relationships start this way. Meet someone, hook up, see if you like them enough to want to date them. When I met my current partner I decided I wouldn’t date him because he lived too far away but I was interested in hooking up. We live together and are getting married next month.

/u/Jilltro

You could always...um...spontaneously move into his home. (Maybe avoid trying this tactic).

My husband was first just a hookup. Then a booty call/FWB situation. Then I just kind of moved in with him on the spur of the moment and we've been together ever since. It's going on ten years now. We even have a couple of kids.

/u/family_of_trees

But remember, people, starting off as hookup buddies doesn't always work out.

My ex boyfriend started as what I thought was going to a one night stand.. We ended up together for two years.. But it was a very unhealthy relationship.

/u/keepfloatin19

The conclusion here? Don't be discouraged about your love life because your "just hooking up" with people. Chances are it really could turn into something serious!

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