How To Meet Someone At A Wedding (Who Knows, Maybe You Two Will Be Next?)
Everyone knows how to play Facebook roulette. It's when you scroll through your Facebook feed, hopelessly trying to avoid engagement announcements and wedding photos posted by people you haven't seen or spoken to since your high school graduation. Seriously, who has time to attend these things if someone you know gets married every weekend? I mean, the entire wedding is pretty much documented online anyway so why go? The answer, of course, is for personal gain. Those optimistic wedding guests have figured out how to meet someone at a wedding and I'm here to tell you how you can do it, too.
First, you've got to ditch the professional wedding date. Trust me. You don't need them. I know this adorable meet-cute worked out for Debra Messing in the aptly-titled movie, The Wedding Date, but real life is nothing like rom-coms of the 2000s. I learned that the hard way.
Once you've gotten over the idea that you have to take a date to every wedding you get invited to, you'll find that attending weddings when you're single isn't as traumatic as you expected. In fact, it's actually kind of fun and did I mention packed with opportunity? Nothing like a day dedicated to celebrating true love to make you and everyone else on the guest list sink into their feels.
Catching the bouquet to ensure a trip down the aisle is a myth but these five tips to meet someone at a wedding are the real deal.
Go Stag Or With A BFF You Can Trust To Be Your Wingwoman
Going with a date (even if it is a fake one) immediately limits your chances of meeting someone. Believe it or not, other single people in attendance will take note of the guests who appear to be spoken for and they'll steer clear of them to avoid expending wasted energy on meaningless small talk.
If you show up solo, on the other hand, you're likely to turn more heads at the door than the bride will when she walks down the aisle. Too bold for you? That's OK. A safer alternative is to invite someone who's obviously a best friend along — one who's willing to talk you up to any cute bartenders or distant relatives of the groom and one who's quick to disappear once you've exchanged phone numbers or Instagram handles with a potential keeper.
In either case, the idea is to convey availability and approachability. Once you've mastered this, it's time to move on to strategy.
Hang Out Near The Bar Or Refreshments Table
Love can be overwhelming, which is why some singles will probably gravitate toward to the hard stuff — cake and alcohol — while everyone else fawns over the newlywed couple. If you're down to have a good time and meet new people, this is the place to do it.
Other guests — those with spouses, serious partners, or children — typically monopolize the dinner tables and the dance floor because both of these hot spots facilitate group activity. The bar, on the other hand, is an ideal spot to hang out by your lonesome until you work up the courage to talk to the person standing a few feet away from you (also alone).
Approach People Outside Of Your Social Circle
Don't feel tethered to the handful of people you actually know at this wedding. Chances are, you've known them for a few years now so if there were any romantic potential there, you'd have picked up on it by now. Abandon the troops (sorry, guys!) and go off on your own in search of single-gal intel.
Look for the person who's lingering by themselves, who's engaging in brief, seemingly humorous conversation with passers-by, and whose gaze catches yours from across the room because yup, you're both doing the exact, same thing.
Sure, weddings are mostly about tradition but you're looking for novelty. Try approaching someone you haven't met before if they've caught your attention. Think of it as a networking event, without the business cards but with the same stuffy outfits.
Introduce Yourself Confidently
Alright, now that you've laid the foundation, it's time to get your hands dirty (that's a metaphor, not a dirty joke). Your opening line should be direct and genuine, like, "Hi, I'm Sydnee. Cheers on your taste in drinks. Couldn't help but notice we're both having white wine."
Since this isn't technically a networking event, there's no need to lead with your job title. Instead, it's better to mention something specific that you noticed about them, like their choice of drink or attire. A charming compliment goes a long way.
Keep The Conversation Going By Asking Questions
But don't interrogate them! A good place to start is the obvious, "So, bride or groom?" This gives the other person an opportunity to share as little or as much about themselves as they feel comfortable doing. Follow this up with an anecdote about how you know the happy couple. Maybe you met them in college years ago or maybe they drunkenly divulged their love story to you a few months ago in an Uber pool.
Naturally (and hopefully), your anecdote will segue into questions about where your new friend went to college or where they currently live. If the interest is mutual, they'll reciprocate with questions of their own. If, however, they seem hesitant or annoyed by your probing, politely wish them a fun night ahead and set your sights on someone else.
Luckily, wedding season typically runs from late spring to early fall and, judging from the looks of your Facebook feed, you'll have plenty of opportunities to shop around. Best wishes!