How To Get Over An Ex, According To 4 People Who Used These Genius Strategies
Getting over a relationship is no easy feat. The person you used to make a majority of your plans with is out of your life, and building a new present and future without that person can sometimes seen insurmountable. The smaller things can hurt, too: who do you send memes to? Who do you tag on funny Instagrams? One day, you were half of a duo; now, you're not... and that can sting. As rough as you might feel right now, you don't need to feel this way forever. If you're thinking about how to get over an ex, you're not alone.
Below, four people share the strategies they used for moving on after a breakup. Before you try any of these moves, though, consider cutting off communication with your ex if possible. If the two of you are in the same friend group, that may make things more difficult, but explain to your friends that maybe for some time you'd like to hang out with them separately from your ex. Do the usuals: block on social media, delete pictures from your Instagram (or at least, archive), and give it a good cry. Once you've let out that sad energy, here are some things to do to move forward with your life.
Do some meditation – either with the help of an app or not.
When Millie*, 24, and her ex of a year split up, she immediately downloaded the app Headspace, to practice meditation for 10 days. The app helped Millie get her anxiety under control post-breakup. "It helped with the onset of panic attacks when I'd wake up in the middle of the night and he wouldn't be there anymore," Millie tells Elite Daily. "It also made me realize that when my mind is spinning out, I can [...] reel it back in."
Isabel, 21, also found help through meditation after she broke up with her college boyfriend of four years. "I needed to strengthen the relationship I held with myself as it was basically nonexistent," Isabel tells Elite Daily. "In order to do this, I decided I needed a significant change, so I started meditating every morning before I started my day. Sitting with myself for just 15 minutes, I focused on my intentions for the day and thought about some of the things that made me happy that I could do, instead of sitting around thinking about my broken heart."
Isabel credits meditating and focusing on herself to moving forward. Now, six months after the breakup, she feels comfortable dating other people.
Surround yourself with people who will support you.
After her breakup, Millie felt like she was mourning who she used to be. To get through it, she made sure that she spent time with people to fill her free time. "When I wasn't at work, I'd watch Lifetime movies with my besties, go to the movies with some fab friends, [and] hang out with my sister's fiancé while I cried."
Remind yourself of why you broke up.
It can be easy to idealize someone after a relationship ends, but it probably wasn't all sunny the whole time. Refresh your memory to move forward by writing down the issues in your relationship.
"Get a sheet of paper and write out things you now realize were warning signs, things you expected to like but did not enjoy the reality of, where you had gaps in communication, how you could be more considerate, what things you found out were deal-breakers, and so forth," a Reddit user said on a thread.
Sweat it out.
Listen to our good friend Elle Woods.
Alice*, 24, knew her relationship was coming to an end when she began boxing to cope. "I felt tired and stuck in who I was in that relationship, and I wanted to gain a feeling of growing as a person instead," Alice tells Elite Daily. She has continued to box after the relationship ended in January.
Even if you do all the above, remember it's totally normal to feel sadness and pain for awhile after a breakup. There's no magic amount of time for you to get over it, but these things certainly can help.
*Names have been changed.
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