How To Deal With A Flaky Friend, Because Getting Ditched Is So Lame
Categorizing someone as your best friend is accepting their personality package deal. No one's perfect, and you really do love everything about this person and couldn't imagine not having a friendship with them. But sometimes, those little not-so-awesome qualities are a struggle to deal with. This much can be said about your best friend who is so, so flaky. You have to learn how to deal with a flaky friend, or you'll end up feeling super spent.
Again, this person is so much fun to be around (when they don't flake) and that's exactly what keeps your friendship going. It takes practice and so much freaking patience to deal with a flaky friend, but ultimately, it's worth the juggling you have to do.
Your flaky friend might not even do it on purpose. Flakiness could result from planning way too many things at once and not keeping track. It can also be because you were feeling one way when you made plans and when it comes times, you are so not down for it anymore. Whatever your BFF's reasoning is time and time again, you and other ditched friends could totally write a book on the struggles of dealing with a flaky friend.
1. Their Flakiness Has No Pattern
The worst thing about your BFF being flaky, is that there's no pattern to it. Clearly, because they aren't ditching you all of the time, it's hard to pinpoint when exactly they will flake. The lack of a pattern makes it increasingly more difficult to counteract it and leaves so much up to chance.
2. Double Dates Take So Much Convincing
Why wouldn't you want to go on double dates with your best friend? It would be horrible to show up and she's the only one who doesn't come through. When it's time for a double date, you are touching base with her often and reciting the details so she can't say she wasn't aware of anything. Persistence is key.
3. Your Wake-Up Calls Never Work
When you're dealing with a flaky friend, calling and reminding them is part of your routine. If you planned on hanging out in the morning, your wake-up calls likely never work. Once flaking is set in someone's mind, it's almost impossible to deter them from the idea of ditching your game plan.
4. You Have To Reiterate How Much You Really Want To Do Something, ALL OF THE TIME
You don't want to say you have to guilt trip your BFF, but it's basically what it is. When you really don't want them to flake, you have to repeat how important or how interested you are in doing the plans you don't want them to ditch. Sometimes it works and other times it doesn't. Too bad biscuits aren't the only things that are flaky.
5. Reservations Are A Non-Existent Thing In Your Friendship
You don't really have that luxury of reserving anything when it comes to plans with your flaky best friend. For starters, it's up in the air whether or not they will show up and you don't want to deal with any cancellation fees, if they apply. Reservations probably even make them anxious or more prone to flake because, commitment.
6. You Constantly Make Excuses For Their Absence
This is your best friend we're talking about, so covering for them is in your nature. You don't want to frame them as a bad person because they flake, so you make up an excuse for why they aren't in attendance for the millionth time. Hey, what are friends for?
7. You Never Quite Cope With Being Ditched
Although your BFF has probably flaked on you countless times, you never really accept the feeling of being ditched. Yeah, you should be used to it, but you still react the same — disappointed. You shouldn't ever have to get used to being ditched though, so if it's becoming too much of a problem, talk about it with your BFF.
The one thing you have to remember when dealing with a flaky friend is that they are a friend first. Flakiness may not be a golden quality, but you should have so many other amazing ones to compare it to.