I don’t spend a lot of time and energy worrying about whether or not my partner is faithful, because the way they treat me gives me all the reassurance I need to know they aren’t stepping out on me — or at least, that it's very unlikely. What I’m saying is that if you’re wondering how to know if your partner is faithful, just pay attention to how they treat you. While I’m confident in my current partner — to be honest, if I wasn’t I’d be out the door quick, because I am done worrying about partners and fidelity — I’ve done my share of that kind of stressing by trying to stay with partners who just weren’t fully invested. I’ll never do that again, and you shouldn’t have to, either.
So, instead of focusing on all the hints and clues that your partner might be cheating, let’s put a positive spin on things and focus on all they ways the experts say you can tell if you partner is being faithful. That way, you can stop sweating about it and just enjoy your relationship. Here is how the experts say you’ll know your partner is all about you, and you only.
Does your partner act shady and like they're keeping secrets? If so, Chris Armstrong, founder of the relationship coaching company Maze of Love, tells Elite Daily they probably are. However, Armstrong says the sign of a faithful partner is that they're always open. “Meaning, they do not try and hide texts or emails and when you ask them how their day is or where they're going, they don't get defensive or jumpy,” he explains. “When someone is faithful, they have nothing to hide.”
Do you know what to expect from your partner day to day, or are they unreliable and run hot and cold? Armstrong says if it’s the former, that’s a strong indication that your partner is staying loyal. “When someone is faithful, they are comfortable in their own skin, [this] instead of trying to portray someone else,” he says. “Their mannerisms are consistent and their communication is consistent. Different than this is someone who is cheating and thus finds it hard to distinguish who they are around their partner from who they are around the 'other' person.”
If someone is cheating, they basically have one foot in and one foot out of the relationship. So, they are a lot less likely to put in the kind of work it takes to make even the "healthiest" of relationships strong. However, Marline Francois-Madden, LCSW, psychotherapist, and CEO of Hearts Empowerment Counseling Center, tells Elite Daily that a partner who is fully committed will be all in on the relationship — and present. “[If] your partner is making a conscious effort to be fully present and engaged when in your presence," that's a good sign, says Francois-Madden.
Intimacy, particularly emotional intimacy, is a positive sign that your partner is faithful, says Laurel House, celebrity dating and relationship coach and host of Man Whisperer podcast. The problem, she explains — and a major red flag — is a partner who begins withholding it. “Intimacy, both physical and emotional, is an essential component to a healthy relationship,” House tells Elite Daily. “Denying intimacy can be a sign that your partner doesn’t want to connect with you anymore, which might be because they are connecting with someone else. Intimacy [in a] relationship should be a connector, bringing you two closer.”
Perhaps the clearest sign that your partner is faithful is how trusting they are of you. If they are cheating, they are more likely to assume or suspect the same of you. “[If you’re] incessantly being questioned, asked what you did last night, if they are checking your phone, and showing blatant distrust of you, it might be because they are the one who isn’t being trustworthy,” warns House. “If they seem to have a strange focus on cheating, it could be because their mind and energy is focused on cheating. It’s like when someone is pregnant, and all they see are pregnant people. Or if you get a new white car, suddenly all you see are white cars. You see what you are doing yourself.” But the opposite is true, too: If your partner is confident, it’s a sign that cheating is likely the furthest thing from their mind.
While all of these are really positive signs that your relationship is in a good place and that your partner is faithful, it’s no substitute for good communication. If you have a solid foundation of communication in your relationship, you'll be able to openly and honestly talk about your feelings if any of these signs stick out to you, before anyone starts looking elsewhere for fulfillment. Because seriously, who has time to be with someone they have to constantly worry about cheating? No one.
