It may sound strange, but I actually love meeting the parents. Instead of being nervous, I'm just really curious to see what my partner's family is like and get more insight into how it shaped them. And not to mention, there is usually some free food involved, and who doesn't love a good home-cooked meal, am I right?! If I'm even remotely serious about my partner, I'm pretty down to meet their folks as soon as everyone else is ready. So when it comes to recognizing signs your partner wants to meet your parents, I typically try to think about how I act around the subject, which basically boils down to being chill about it.
While I may not sweat that first introduction, I realize I'm not the norm. For a lot of people, the family introduction can be a big deal and a high-pressure situation, so it may take some time for your SO to feel ready. If you're thinking about bringing your partner home for the first time, their readiness is just as important as yours, and it's important to keep an eye out for signs they're down to take that step. For more insight into these signs, Elite Daily contacted NYC relationship expert and love coach Susan Winter to help break down the behaviors that indicate your SO really is ready to meet the fam. Here's what she says to look for.
If you are really into your SO, there may be some temptation to speed things along. However, there is no need to get the family involved unless your boo is just as invested in the relationship as you are. Winter says it's not time to bring home your partner until "you have an exclusive relationship with a proactive partner who loves you. You don't need to wonder where you stand with this mate. You know that they're committed to the relationship, and committed to you."
One thing Winter says to consider is if there is forward movement in the relationship from both sides. According to Winter, there is a good chance your partner wants to meet your family if "you see daily evidence that your partner is willing and able to be a part of your life. They're by your side and taking concrete steps to solidify the relationship you have, as well as move the relationship forward." If they are eager to move things along, meeting your family is a big part of that.
One way to know where your partner stands on meeting your parents is if they have taken steps to introduce you to theirs, says Winter. If your partner is "proud to introduce you to everyone in their social circle," and they "seek inclusion, rather than exclusion and avoidance," it likely means they are comfortable and even excited for you to return the favor.
If you and your SO are in this for the long haul, then, as Winter explains, "meeting your family — and being a part of your family — is a goal for your mate." So, if they are eager to make a life with you, then they likely feel the same way about meeting your family, because, "they understand that partnership is a package deal, and meeting your family is the next logical step as you both move forward."
But the most obvious sign? Well, ask yourself if it’s possible they've been dropping hints that they're ready and willing to meet your folks. Because if your parter is feeling like they are, then Winter says there is a good chance they are already alluding it. Maybe they've done so in a "joking fashion or in imagining a 'future scenario,'" she says. Either way, she explains, this is "your partner [leaving] breadcrumbs to guide you in the desired direction."
While meeting the family is definitely a big step in a relationship, it doesn't have to be a scary or intense one if the timing is right. In fact, it should feel really natural. So if you're ready and your partner is showing the signs Winter describes, then go for it. Just be prepared for embarrassing stories and possibly some awful puberty photos. But hey, that's all a part of the fun.
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