It's no big secret that the honeymoon phase is one of the most exciting periods of a relationship. Everything's fun, new, and you and your partner are probably getting intimate on a pretty regular basis. But as time goes on and you and your SO get more comfortable around each other, that excitement can begin to feel a little less intense. Schedules get busy, you're tired — it's normal! But the good news is, there are plenty of simple things to do to spice up your sex life that require minimal effort, yet yield exciting results. "There's always room to spice up one's sex life even with little changes, it just takes a little creativity and team work," Dr. Dawn Michael, relationship expert and certified clinical sexologist, tells Elite Daily.
That's certainly reassuring, especially if your busy lives make the idea of putting in a ton of effort to keep your sex life going strong seems daunting. But is this all easier said than done? According to sex and intimacy coach Irene Fehr, the key to making your sex life more exciting is to change the way you approach spicing things up entirely. "Here's the thing about keeping it spicy in the bedroom: It’s not about toys or positions. It’s not about looking sexy or even feeling sexy. It’s not even about what you do in sex," Fehr tells Elite Daily. Instead, she says the key is to focus on building and maintaining your romantic connection, and being present. The rest will follow.
"There are only so many ways you can twist your body into a pretzel to create an exciting new position, and only so many games you can play to spice it up," Fehr says. "If you’re chasing things outside of yourselves, you will be forever chasing them to no satisfaction." With that in mind, here's how the experts recommend focusing on your connection and firing up your passion in the bedroom, all with small, easy-to-achieve changes.